Transform Your Life to Be Happy in 17 Simple Steps

Table of Contents How to Transform Your Life and Be HappyLife Transformation: 17 Steps to Change Your LifeSTEP…
Man showing how to transform your life

Life transformation is nothing but all about bringing qualitative change in your life.

Once you transform your life, you feel a lot different. You turn from a pessimist to an optimistic person and from a sad person to a happy one.

You may feel that you’ve changed from being an unlucky to a lucky person, or becoming a successful person from an unsuccessful one!

This change can be emotional, mental, physical, or spiritual in nature.

Let’s not talk about betterment in terms of money and materialistic things because those happen as a byproduct of the life transformation process.

But even if that doesn’t happen, you actually move into a state where such things don’t really matter much.

You gain control over yourself. You change from being a helpless person to a helpful resource, and become a winner rather than a loser.

A good change in life definitely makes you content and happy in various degrees and ways.

There’s no doubt that you need to transform your life to be happy, successful, and at peace.

If you have any doubts about it, then I suggest you to read my earlier post – “Should you change your life?”

That post might stir your mind and set you to re-think about your stance! After all, a revolution in your life begins with your thoughts.

You can change your thoughts and change your world, but only after you’re completely convinced that you need to do so!

If you think that it’s the right time to change for you, then let’s go ahead and bring about the transformation in your life.

“Transformation literally means going beyond your form.” ~ Wayne Dyer


How to Transform Your Life and Be Happy

As I mentioned above, you can change your life with your thoughts. Your thoughts transform into wisdom with experience and knowledge.

On the other hand, knowledge or experience can also motivate you to change your thoughts and your life.

Do read my earlier post titled – “How to change your life with knowledge” for a detailed discussion on this topic.

To recap, in that post I wrote about the simple things you need to do to change your life with knowledge.

These include – knowing yourself, then learning something that can help us improve, and finally practicing what you learn.
You need to go into the detail of each of these steps and more, for total life transformation that will fill your life with happiness.

“Happiness depends more on the inward disposition of mind than on outward circumstances.” ~ Benjamin Franklin

Life Transformation: 17 Steps to Change Your Life

Your life transformation is all about changing yourself. It starts with you and ends with you.

I’m pretty sure by now you understand what transformation of life is all about.


You can transform your life once you transform yourself.

Since you don’t have to depend on anyone or anything else, the key to transform yourself lies within you.

I’d suggest a multi-step approach to prepare yourself and creating chances for changes in life.

I say “chances” because these steps don’t guarantee life transformation, but if you follow them, you’ll surely end up in a much better state than what you are in now, and probably will be a lot happier.

These steps in the life transformation list may appear to be too many, but they won’t seem so when you implement them practically.

Here are the steps to make your life better and bring you happiness. You may change the order if you like, which entirely depends on you.

A woman is happy to experience life transformation

“The only thing that stands between you and your dream is the will to try and the belief that it is actually possible.” ~ Joel Brown

STEP 1: Believe in Yourself

This is the biggest and best mantra of being successful in life.

You’ve all the potential to be what you want to be – you just need to convincingly know that. This thought should appear as a doubtless fact to you, or feel like an unrealized reality – that you can do it.

Self-belief is the biggest force and the essential element to transform your life.

STEP 2: Know Yourself

Remember, nobody can know yourself better than you. Make the effort to find out your strengths and weaknesses.

In the process, you might surprise yourself with your hidden abilities and talents that you never even imagined you possessed.

Knowing yourself creates self-awareness, which is when you realize that there’s need for change in life.

STEP 3: Accept Yourself

Neither are you perfect, nor is anybody else. You should strive for perfection, but first you need to accept your mistakes, faults, shortcomings, and weaknesses.

Accepting that you’ve a problem opens up the door to improvement, and the much needed change to bring happiness in your life.

Self-acceptance is like giving yourself the permission to transform your life, if you believe in change.

STEP 4: Love Yourself

I don’t mean that you become a narcissist, but you should find qualities in yourself that you appreciate and like.

When you begin to like yourself, you’ll be happy and at peace.

Your self-confidence, self-esteem, and self-respect will soar, and your complexes will vanish. You’ll start taking better care of yourself in all aspects, including your beauty and health aspects.

Loving yourself gives you the energy to bring the desired transformation in your life.

STEP 5: Be with Yourself

You live in a family and are part of a society. You are surrounded by family or friends most of the time, or you find yourself immersed in work or other activities.

You need to take out the much needed “me time” – the time to be with your Self, in solitude.

Practicing meditation for some time everyday gives you the opportunity to listen to the faint voices and thoughts that arise from deep within.

Being with yourself can give you the power and potential to bring about a revolution within you.

STEP 6: Have a Purpose in Life

If you know yourself, you’d know that every living being, thing, and event in life has a purpose. You need to know your purpose of life.

Once you find out what you want to be, things you want to do, or places you want to go; you’ve set yourself a goal.

With the power of your belief, you can easily achieve your goals and transform your life.

Having a vision and purpose makes your life meaningful, useful, and interesting.

STEP 7: Make the Right Choices

Life is all about the choices you make.

If your choices are like the steering of your car, which symbolically represents your life, then your life or the car will follow the path steered by your choices.

Your purpose in life can be achieved only if you choose the right life option among the many that life presents to you in its course.

The choices you make regarding your studies, work, skill development, life partner, workplace, job etc., determine if you can make your life better and happier.

Making the right choices are the micro steps in transforming your life.

STEP 8: Set Priorities

Now that you’ve set the goal of your life, you need to implement it in your life.

Know what you need to do and when, so that it serves your purpose well.

Leave out things and tasks that have no meaning for you. Set your life priorities and do those things first that help you in transforming your life.

Prioritizing not only helps you save time and effort, but also makes you progress faster.

STEP 9: Change Your Attitude

Your attitude is a mental state that is composed of your beliefs, thoughts, feelings, and values.

Your negative or weak mental state might not really help you in achieving your purpose of life. Your failure and success in life depends on your attitude.

You need to change your attitude if you wish to change yourself and your life.

STEP 10: Develop Passion

You can only transform your life if you’ve a strong drive or passion to do things. Your drive is powered by your true and strong feelings and emotions.

Passion is your emotional determination that develops a strong liking and desire to achieve something in life.

Life without passion is like an Indian curry without spices. 🙂

STEP 11: Let Go and Forgive

Don’t hold on to grudges or your negative emotions of hate and revenge – release them.

Such feelings will pull you down and not let you transform your life.

As far as possible, forgive the people and events that disturbed you and your life. There’s no use holding on to past grievances as they only make your life miserable and hurt you more.

Letting go and developing tolerance sets you free to change your life.

STEP 12: Improve Relationships

Relationships matter to me, you, and everybody. Many a times they tend to define your life and your life course.

The support you get from your improved relations makes a difference in your attitude, purpose, and brings happiness in your life.

Improving your relationships with kindness helps get rid of misunderstandings and other negativity.

STEP 13: Be Responsible

You need to stop blaming or complaining about people and things in your life. Stop being a victim, instead, take charge of your life and be proactive.

Be mature enough to be responsible for your actions and take life as it comes. Remember, when you can’t change life, change yourself.

By being responsible, you can be more determined to change and bring happiness in your life.

STEP 14: Take Risks

Have no fear – it’s a negative attribute. Remove the fear of failure from your psyche.

When you believe in yourself and have self-confidence, then there’s no place for fear.

Always treat failures as stepping stones to your success because they always teach you lessons in disguise, though you get to know about them much later.

Taking calculated risks in life increase your chances of success and being happy.

STEP 15: Practice Gratitude

Be thankful to everyone and everything that you come across in your life.

It’s because of them that you’re in your present situation and here. Remember, if your condition is bad, it could have been worse.

If you feel you’re in a better condition than many others, then you’ve all the more reasons to be grateful for.

Practicing gratitude fills you with love and makes you more content and happy in life.

STEP 16: Develop Good Habits

When you made the effort to know yourself, did you come across any bad habits you possessed? It’s time now to discard them and adopt the good habits.

It’s not only about your habits, but also the routine you follow that might need to be changed.

Change your life pattern and the way you live your daily life, if you feel it needs to be changed.

STEP 17: Expect the Best

Life will give you the best, only if you expect the best. The Law of Attraction works well here and will bring in all the positives in your life, if you remain positive.

Keep yourself motivated, keep striving to give your best, and remain focused on what you want in life.

Best expectations are realized when you make your best efforts, best choices, and put your best foot forward in all aspects and respects.

When you expect and give your best you’ll definitely make your life different from what it was before.

Here’s a video that you must see as it adds many other characteristics and dimensions for transforming your life.

Transform your life ~ Wayne Dyer ~ YouTube Video

“To become different from what we are, we must have some awareness of what we are.” ~ Eric Hoffer

Small positive changes in life add up to make big positive changes.

If you adopt a most of these changes and they make you feel a completely different person and happier than before, then it’s a clear indication that you have transformed your life.

I’m sure now you know that changing your life isn’t difficult – is it? But it isn’t easy either if you don’t follow the above steps.

There are many ways to achieve transformation of your life – it can be through losing weight, learning new skills, taking up new courses, or securing more sources of revenue.

No matter what way you choose, you need to follow these steps of transformation because you experience a total change of your life only when you change yourself.

Remember, there’s no magical formula for life transformation, but these steps do bring the magic in your life. So, are you ready to transform your life to be happy? 🙂

“If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading.” ~ Lao Tzu

Over to you –

I know this post isn’t comprehensive as a lot more can be added to it. Most importantly it lacks your contributions in form of views, thoughts, and examples from your personal experiences.

Pour them over to make it a complete guide to transforming life to achieve happiness. So, tell me –

Did you ever feel the need to transform your life? What steps did you take? What additional steps would you suggest for total life transformation and to be happier in life? Share in the comments.

Photo Credit: AlicePopkorn

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

  1. Another great post! Loving myself used to mystify me, until I learned how. My book explains in depth the steps you suggest. Two articles are helpful. The first explains the difference between self-esteem, self-acceptance, and self-love. The second suggests 10 Tips to Self-Love.

    Darlene Lancer

    1. Hi Darlene,

      Glad you liked the post and could relate to it. 🙂

      Nice to know more about your book and it’s great that you have written about this earlier.

      Thanks for stopping by and sharing your views. 🙂

      BTW- Why don’t you get yourself a Gravatar, so that we can see who we are talking to. Just a friendly suggestion as I do see you have a nice picture at your blog. 🙂

  2. This was an extremely motivational post 🙂

    It seems we think it’s silly that simply loving and believing in ourselves can transform our lives. Transformation depends on action, right? Little do we know that our actions rely entirely on our mindset and our subconscious beliefs. So we have to love and believe in ourselves!

    Great post, Harleena! Thank you!

    1. Hi Kalina,

      Glad you liked the post on how to transform your life to be happy 🙂

      Yes indeed, transformation depends on our thoughts and actions, and we can change to become what we want, and when we want. The self-belief is all we need – isn’t it?

      Thanks for stopping by and sharing your views 🙂

  3. Hi Harleena,

    What a great post. The most important thing I do every night is write my gratitude journal. It help me to be positive even on a crappiest day because there are so many things that I can be grateful. The thing was before I started writing this journal, I took these things for granted.

    There are few things here that I need to improve on for example – taking ‘me’ time, loving myself, feeling guilty about things that I have no control over. I have to grow so much in this area.

    Thanks for sharing Brent’s video.

    Have a great week.


    1. Hi Damyanthi – nice to have you back after long 🙂

      Writing a gratitude journal is a great way to remain grateful and pen down your thoughts about it. It reminded me of the time when I used to do that too while I was studying, and it surely does help a great deal to make you a better person.

      You’re not alone because I need these reminders myself too, and taking out the ‘me’ time is the toughest of them all. I guess you get so tied down with other things and give those priority that you forget yourself in the run. Glad you liked Brent’s video – I think he spoke a lot of wisdom – isn’t it?

      Thanks for stopping by, and have a nice week ahead as well 🙂

  4. This is such a nice article me need to follow this for happy life. always find something interesting in your blog..

    1. Hi Prince,

      Glad you liked the post. 🙂

      Yes, if you can follow these steps, they would surely transform your life to bring you more happiness in your life. Thanks for your kind words of appreciation 🙂

  5. Hi Harleena,

    When we do not get the required output for our hard work as input, demotivation prevails. In this situation, it becomes quite difficult to stay happy. You have given very nice points to be happy in those conditions too. Believing in ourselves and not loosing hope will work but it all needs patience.

    Thanks for the motivating article.

    1. Hi Yogesh,

      Yes it does, and that’s very normal too, something that happens with all of us 🙂

      But just as I mentioned it’s all in our mind and the choices we make. If we choose to be happy, nothing can stop us, whereas if we choose to be unhappy, then too, nothing can stop us from feeling that way. Yes, with time and patience, things do work out and you can transform your life with ease.

      Thanks for stopping by and sharing your views 🙂

      1. But it is easier said than done.
        It needs experience to generate skills to choose happy while we are in a state of low ebb. However, if we once have generated such skills, there is really no one who can stop us from being happy.

        1. I agree that it’s not easy, Yogesh. But as you mentioned, once you gain experience and have gained the required knowledge and wisdom along the way, nothing is difficult either. These steps will help you transform your life to be a much happier person, and you can pick just a few of them to get started – isn’t it?

          Thanks once again 🙂

  6. Hi Harleena,

    This was a brilliant post and the 17 steps you included for life transformation were fantastic.

    Personal transformation is an area that is very close to my heart and something I’ve been doing for the past 11 years or so.

    One of the steps you included in your list really stood out for me. It was the last point about expecting the best. This is such a powerful attitude to adopt and anyone can do so, no matter what their background, experience, qualifications etc. is. By expecting the best, we take control of our own self-worth, and truly believe we deserve to live a life of abundance.

    Thank you.

    1. Hi Hiten,

      Nice to know that you liked the post and could relate to the mentioned steps to transform your life 🙂

      Yes indeed, you are the right person to know all about personal transformation, something that you yourself too have been undergoing I think – isn’t it?

      You are absolutely right about the last point, though very few of us do that. More so, when you expect the best, you WILL get the best too. The positiveness or Law of Attraction always works in such cases, but provided you believe – that is the core of it all, isn’t it?

      I just wish people would try and adopt a few of these steps in their lives to see their lives transformed, which is bound to make them happier than they might be earlier.

      Thanks for stopping by and adding more value to the post 🙂

  7. Lot’s of great advice Harleena.

    I’m always interested in learning more about how to live a happy life. The biggest challenge I have had in the past has been your #1, believe in yourself. It took me many years to understand that I can do anything I want to. And, after that, things have been so much easier. The past years, I’ve been thinking a lot about what my purpose in life is, and what I’m really passionate about. I’m always learning, that’s for sure 🙂

    1. Hi Jens,

      Glad you liked these steps to transform your life 🙂

      Ah…don’t we all look for ways to be happy, but how many of us really find what we are looking for. I agree with you, self-belief isn’t easy for most of us for various reasons, and it often takes a while before we get that self-confidence.

      I guess if we think we can….we can! We just need to believe in that small inner-voice that keeps telling us to carry on against all odds, but we tend to stop that voice most of the time, don’t we?

      Once you find your answer to that one, which again is hidden within you, you’d be a much happier person because you’d have a real focus in life then, or perhaps you’d know which direction your life is headed. Yes, learning should never end, and that’s how we evolve. 🙂

      Thanks for stopping by and contributing to the post 🙂

  8. Hello Mam,

    I fist time came on your blog and I find it very motivating. You are a true motivator. To live a happy life there need to some transformation in us. We have to start love our self, believe our self and most important is our self confidence of doing something change every thing bad to good, looser to winner. thanks for sharing. 🙂

    1. Welcome to the blog Kumar!

      Nice to know that you find my blog inspiring and motivating 🙂

      Yes indeed, if you can transform your life to bring you happiness, nothing like it. I don’t say we all need to transform our lives, but if we do, there is no harm in doing so – for the better, isn’t it? It is all in our mind – we can become a winner from a loser in the split of a second, provided we want to.

      Thanks for stopping by 🙂

      1. Hello, Harleena mam,

        If a bit transformation gives us better happiness, better life, makes us better and influenced human, why don’t we? Again,that bit of transformation depends on our mind, or I better say, our unconscious mind. Isn’t it? I personally feel, transforming a human is not possible without the involvement of mind (conscious and unconscious). I agree with you, there is no harm in a bit transformation. I will always remember your suggestions.
        Thank You.

        1. Hi Kumar,

          Yes indeed, if a change can make us better, there is no reason not to adopt that change in our lives. I agree, it is all in the mind and if we want, we can achieve anything and everything, provided there is a strong will for it.

          Thanks once again 🙂

  9. Hi Harleena,

    You laid out some important highlights when it comes to transforming your life and be happy.

    How does one expect to transform their life if they don’t believe in themselves? We all have the potential to be whatever we want to be if we put our minds into it.

    Accepting yourself is another big one. I think as human beings we sort of beat ourselves up a little bit. We think we’re failures but we’re not. If we all learn to change the way we think our paradigm will shift. We need to accept ourselves for what we have become.

    That leads to loving yourself. Once we love ourselves we will be happy and be at peace. I agree with you there 110%. Awesome points you have laid out!

    Thanks the awesome Article!

    Have a great weekend!

    1. Hi Nate,

      Absolutely! You cannot transform your life if you don’t believe in yourself and your abilities. It all first starts from you! We can become what we want to because of the tremendous potential and power we have within us, but that happens only when we want to make it happen.

      Yes indeed, it’s tough for most of us to accept ourselves for who and what we are. Either we try to underestimate ourselves, or then over-estimate, we just can’t come to accept ourselves the way we are. Yes, there’s always scope for improvement and adopting the positive changes in our lives, but we need to accept that there is a problem at hand first.

      Self-acceptance leads to loving ourselves, which is another important point most of us neglect in the long run. We are too hard on ourselves at times I think, and that plays on our minds adversely.

      Thanks for stopping by and contributing to the post. 🙂

  10. You really covered a lot in this post.

    I want to share with you my attitude years ago. I felt a black cloud was following me. Nothing major, but my fish broke, the garage door wouldn’t open, etc. They were little things. I met this woman who turned my life around. She offered pretty much the same tips as you. She said if you think that there is a black cloud following you, then there is, but if you change your attitude and look at the positive and see things differently, I can assure your life will change. She was so right. It is the power of positive thinking.

    1. Hi Arleen,

      Glad you liked the post 🙂

      Wow! That really sounded mysterious I’d say! Yes indeed, just as I was mentioning above, it is ALL in the mind. If you think positive, there is only positivity that will come before you. But if your mind is clouded with negative thoughts, you will always be surrounded by them. So, the choice lies in your hands, and as you mentioned, you can transform your life by changing your attitude and way of thinking to bring you long lasting happiness.

      Thanks for stopping by and sharing your experiences with us. 🙂

  11. Hi Harleena,

    Yeah, I know I’m a late comer lately but I’m always glad to make it 🙂

    Impressive post! Makes me think as always.

    This post recalls me of my past 🙂 At that time I didn’t think about being free as today. I really feel I’m transformed for some extent and following what I always wanted to do dear. Even under circumstances 🙂

    I’ve just came home attending a funeral near by. At there, my friends and I were talking about youngsters and elders who decided to suicide instead of transforming their lives. I can relate bit there as I know when you find no options, help or feel trapped, it will stimulate you to get the worst decisions in your life. I wish if they could try alternatives or found support from somewhere.

    If we are in a worst situation, I think we should start with the taking responsibility Harleena 🙂 We might feel like we are the ones with problems. I know, it may be not your fault but if we always blame others without doing what we can do, there will be no improvement. Actually, it’s not easy when you going through that phase. But even hanging in there and starting it slowly is a BIG win. That’s how I practiced patience 🙂 Unless, as you implied, we will always be victims and we won’t find how being ourselves, loving ourselves and such, which builds our confidence can help us. Well, as my experience 🙂

    Transformation is not a quick process, isn’t it Harleena? 🙂 We always tied into our old habits and it’s really hard to let ’em go. Even you try to change it for few days, again we tend to stuck in same old ones. It’s hard but really worth it 🙂

    When you feel happy and free, gosh… it’s awesome 🙂 I know that no one would be able to follow all the tips you mentioned at once, but getting into them really matters. Some folks find them like some stuff that no one ever bothers about. But those who possess such qualities always live their lives meaningfully and that’s where I find people who consume happiness everyday 🙂 I’m happy to see that I follow many of ’em, but I wanna improve more. How come I not, when I come across such wonderful posts?

    You have a lovely weekend ahead dear 🙂


    1. Hi Mayura,

      Ah…you are never late, and you know that you are always welcome here – whenever you find the time to make it. Remember, even if you cannot make it due to your work pressure, I understand, so please don’t take it on to yourself 🙂

      Nice to know that you could relate so well to the post. Yes, most of us sail in the same boat because what we were a few years, isn’t what we are now. I think most of us have transformed into someone better than before, and that change, if for the good, is worth it – isn’t it?

      Absolutely! Running away, taking the wrong way, thinking negatively, or suicide, are all the ways a negative person or a coward would take I strongly feel. Yes, sometimes their reasons may be real or what they believe in, but for me, I think that’s taking an easy or escapist way out. Living life and facing the challenges is what life is all about, and that takes a lot of courage, which sadly such people lack.

      You need to transform your life if you want to be happy, and there are many ways of doing that, as mentioned in the post, which I wish people adopt. I agree with you, it’s not easy when you are the one facing the hardships of life because you mostly face it all alone. But what gives you the courage to carry on – no one but your own willpower and the inner-voice that tells you to carry on, isn’t it? Yes, start slowly, change your ways, the way you think, and you will learn to appreciate the changes you make in your life. I know the transformation you must have gone through your life, especially when you’ve earlier mentioned about the circumstances in your home that weren’t always positive.

      Oh yes…transforming yourself to become better isn’t easy, but it’s not tough either, if you are determined, just like you were. Old habits take time to break, but once you adopt the new ones, the old ones are left behind. But for that, you need to make the first move or things don’t happen. You need tremendous willpower and a willingness to break old habits, and YOU alone can do that, no one else.

      Of course, it’s not easy to follow all these steps, but even if you are able to make a start somewhere and pick up a few, it’s a good thing and you will certainly see a good and positive change in your life. I know you follow most of these steps, and if this post helps you to add more to your list, there is no way to stop you from transforming your life to bring more happiness in your life.

      Thanks for stopping by and taking out your precious time to write such a lovely comment, which you know I value more than anything else. Have a nice week ahead as well 🙂

  12. Hi Harleena,
    Visiting back your blog after a long time. Could not give time to reading in last few days. I am really happy to see this topic here and same effective explanation on the same. This is a widely needed change as many people are suffering from improper mental state. This post is useful and elaborate.
    Thanks a lot.

    1. Hi Suhas – good to have you back 🙂

      Not a problem, and I’m just glad you found the time finally to stop by here today. Yes indeed, if we can transform our lives and change for the better, nothing like it because that will only do us good in the long run, isn’t it?

      Thanks for stopping by 🙂

  13. A very interesting post as always Harleena,

    And, i quit agree with all you said here. You know, we all need to transform ourselves for the better, that is why they said that change is constant but, its only when you change for the better that it becomes good.

    Everything we do in life starts from our mindset, the way we thinks and the way we view things. If you think positively, you will end up being a very positive person but if you think negatively, you will also end up being a negative person.

    I’ve come to realize that we’re sometimes the ones that normally create troubles for ourselves via our mindset.

    In his book….The Power Of Positive Thinking, Norman Vincent Peale made it clear that we’re are the offspring’s of our thoughts. He shared a story of a man that is always afraid and nervous and after interviewing this young man, he discovered that it was caused by what he thinks.

    He sees himself as inferior and unimportant because of what people normally tell him and, that affected his life so greatly that he is always afraid.

    He now said that…..No One Can Make You Feel Inferior Without Your Permission and, that is so true.

    I beg to stop here Harleena though, i still have a lot to share but, i think I’ve already made my points. I don’t want the comment to be as long as yours :)… Lol

    Thanks for sharing and, this is wishing you more positive transformations in life :).

    1. Hi Theodore,

      Nice to know that you liked the post and could relate so well to it 🙂

      You are SO right in saying that! Any change for the better is what you need to adopt and adapt to, and you can easily transform your life to be happy if you want to. Just as I was mentioning to Adrienne above – it all depends on us and the choices we make in our lives.

      If you want to be happy, no one or nothing can stop you from being that, while if you wish to be sad or negative, no one but you yourself can stop you from becoming that too. It all lies in your hand and state of mind.

      I liked the little story you mentioned and Norman’s book is worth reading for sure. Yes, the man was imprisoned within his own fears and thoughts. He had the key to his chains, but was afraid to use them – till he found it was time to do so. Just as I said earlier…you think and become who and what you are and here he thought he was inferior and so he was, in his own eyes, which matters most.

      Ah…I enjoyed your long comment, and you never have to stop here, you know that! Because I enjoy reading your comments and feedback on the post, and never see the length and I hope you don’t see mine too, though it does become so obvious 😉

      Thanks for stopping by and adding much more to the post. Oh yes…there are lots of positive transformations coming up on this blog, so stay tuned dear friend 🙂

  14. I agree with everyone Harleena, wonderful post and just really spot on with all these points.

    I won’t sound like a broken record because you know where I am on this subject. I honestly believe I’m happy and have been for the majority of my life because of knowing how precious life truly is and how many other things just really don’t matter.

    It’s the same thing with my parents. They were married until my Dad passed away. I didn’t come from divorced parents so I can’t even relate to some of the things other people have gone through. I’m not belittling their experiences at all but I preach all the time that life is about choices and they are all in your hands. You chose the path you want to take so what’s it going to be! Stay where you are being miserable or do something about it! You know my choice.

    I hope that anyone who is having any issues at all in this area will really read this post several times because they truly can be happy. It is their choice.


    1. Hi Adrienne,

      Glad you liked the post 🙂

      I know that for sure even though you’ve mentioned it many times before, but that’s also because you look at life so positively and welcome the changes life puts forth. I know we might take a while to take in all the changes because I really don’t like changes all that much myself, but anything for the good, is worth going in for.

      Absolutely! Life IS all about the choices you make, and these choices always lie in your hands. You are what you make yourself to be, and you can easily transform your life to be happy, provided you want to. Just as I say so often, it’s all in the mind, though most people tend to forget this simple fact.

      Thanks for stopping by and adding more value to the post 🙂

  15. Hi Harleena,

    Thank you for such an insightful post full of great tips! Indeed, there are a lot of simple things that we can do daily. Transformation starts with our thoughts. However, as our past experiences and knowledge also affect how we think, it is crucial that we are aware that some thoughts may not be empowering. Stopping the unhelpful thoughts is important.
    Acknowledging our past successes is a great way to start feeling grateful for. From many seemingly unimportant successes, we build our confidence. We then have the focus and energy to do the things we truly love to do.

    Loving Brent Smith’s practical tips! Start with being grateful is the single most powerful strategy that most people actually are not aware. Our feeling grateful can set us a path of many other beautiful thoughts.

    Great sharing, Harleena! I appreciate you!

    1. Hi Viola,

      Glad you liked these tips to transform your life 🙂

      Yes indeed, transformation first starts from within – our thoughts, which later turn into actions. Oh yes…stopping our minds from thinking about the past, future, or the going the negative way IS important, or else you tend to worry too much or attract negativity around you.

      I think you can be grateful for so many things in your life, only if you stop and look around you. Whether it’s your past success, or the lovely flowers that bloom each day, or the smile of your child – the list is endless, isn’t it? All of these bring us much happiness and make us feel good about ourselves.

      I loved Brent’s video too, and I think besides the gratefulness, he talked a lot of wisdom all through. I just wish more of us would do what he mentioned 🙂

      Thanks for stopping by and adding more value to the post 🙂

  16. Hi Singh,

    Been happy in life is more than wealth, riches, connection, material, and many more about world asset to talk and think off. Life can still become miserable if one have all these without full happiness and desirable joy in ones life. Real happiness comes in diverse of way but the one within matters alot as you have said, I love to be happy, therefore, I gave nobody priority to control my emotion so as not to toy with my happiness and joy because I believe in myself and what is worth doing at all is worth doing well.

    1. Welcome to the blog Adesanmi!

      You are absolutely right there – being happy is much more important than the materialistic things in life that most people tend to run after. All the riches, wealth, fame and other things would be useless if you cannot transform your life to be happy in this moment.

      Yes indeed, self-belief plays a major role in bringing you happiness as it boosts your self-esteem and self confidence, and I’m glad you believe in this. 🙂

      Thanks for stopping by and sharing your views 🙂

  17. Harleena you are so right on this. One of the reasons for not being happy is not accepting yourself. Most people find it hard to accept changes about themselves or something that has happened to them. It can be hard accepting things but it has to be done. Once people are able to accept this then a lot of amazing things can happen in their lives. Letting go and forgining is a powerful way to be happy, but not tried it. Perhaps I should look into it. Thanks for these tips.

    1. Hi Shalu,

      Yes, it IS hard for most people to accept themselves for who and what they are, and if they cannot do that, how can they ever be happy.

      You can change or transform your life only when you learn to accept yourself and feel good about it too. Letting go and forgiving are not easy for anyone, but they are the key to bringing happiness in your life too. It’s tough I know, but it’s the only way out too 🙂

      Thanks for stopping by and contributing to the post 🙂

  18. These are great statements to learning to change your life, Harleena. It drives me nutty when I hear people taking negative.

    I like the video, being grateful is a big part of finding happiness. Every evening I remember to be grateful for all the good in my day.

    When something not so good happens I always look for the positive in it, because there always is something to learn from it.

    Thanks Harleena for the inspiration and again your wisdom.

    1. Hi Debbie,

      Absolutely! Most people think negatively, and when they do that, they tend to attract more negativity around them. You cannot transform your life this way at all – isn’t it?

      Glad you liked the video, and yes, being grateful or expressing gratitude brings you much joy and happiness. Just as you mentioned, even if you are able to do that for the smallest of things, any time of the day, it’s good enough. This is something that I’m trying to instill in my kids too.

      I agree with you there, we do need to look for the good within the bad, because there is always something good hidden within, which we come to know of much later perhaps. I guess this also makes us things positive and feel good about things.

      Thanks for stopping by and sharing your views here 🙂

  19. Hi Harleena,

    This is a wonderful post and I really enjoyed the video. I agree with all the points you’ve made and won’t comment on them individually apart from your recommendation to try meditation, which I think can make a huge difference.

    I now practice simple mindfulness meditation every day – I make time for it, no matter what. I think it’s helped me become more aware and in control of my own emotions and reactions – I’m able more easily, now, to stop myself from getting drawn into negative responses to life events. That doesn’t mean I don’t get angry, anxious, upset etc. from time to time – but I’m able to get over it much more quickly and easily when negative feelings do creep in.

    I watched a BBC documentary the other week, which covered this subject and looked at the science behind personality, and whether it’s really possible for us to change the way we are. It was fascinating – they can pinpoint physical differences in the brains of people who are ‘negative’ in their outlook – inclined to anxiety and depression – as opposed to ‘optimists’. But what was really exciting was the fact that research shows that taking steps to alter our outlook – like practising meditation,for example – can actually result in detectable changes in the brain.

    There’s also been a long-term study of a large population of over-50s, somewhere in the states, that has shown that happiness can have a dramatic effect on our life expectancy – the ‘optimists’ in the study were, on average, living about 7 years longer than their more miserable neighbours – now there’s food for thought!

    So it’s definitely worth our while striving to be happy, Harleena, and I’m grateful to you for this amazing post, which should have us all smiling just a little bit more 🙂


    1. Hi Sue,

      Nice to know that you could relate so well to the post, and yes, I loved the video the moment I saw it too 🙂

      You are lucky to practice meditation, something that I used to do, but haven’t got down to it for sometime now. My Dad got me into transcendental meditation a few years ago, and it really IS wonderful. I agree with what you said – you need to make time for it, and the same is goes with a lot of other things that are priority in your life, isn’t it?

      Yes indeed, meditation does help in more ways than one. Just as you mentioned, you are in a better position to deal with things – positively. Not to mention the health benefits of meditation too, as it reduced my Dad’s blood pressure to a great deal.

      That must be an interesting documentary, and worth watching I must say! Well, just like you mentioned how it positvely affects our brain waves, the same is the case with transcendental meditation, which is even said to affect people around you. It means if you are meditating – it will also positively have an affect on the people around you. It also shows higher awareness, and even kid’s are known to score better if they practice TM, short form of transcendental meditation. You must look up their website with the same name online for more about it, as you are into mediation.

      Absolutely! The happier you are, the longer you live. So, if after knowing that all such things can transform our life, it only makes sense that we all change to make it really happen for us. Oh yes…keep smiling 🙂

      Thanks for stopping by and adding so much more to the post. I appreciate your pearls of wisdom, as always 🙂

    1. I just replied to Lisa above about the same question she raised above, so perhaps you can read it in detail there. But briefly, you trust your instincts and gut feeling, the inner voice that tells you – this is it! For other kind of choices, they usually become better with knowledge, time, and experience. Hope this helps 🙂

      BTW – It would be nice if you grab yourself a Gravatar so that we can all see who we are addressing here. 🙂

      Thanks once again 🙂

  20. These days, its hard to find “ME-TIME” for ourselves when you have no money, But when you become rich and get too busy, then you feel the importance of me-time……It’s harsh truth…Again best post…thanks for this harleena

    1. Hi Sumit,

      I agree with you, and most of us sail in the same boat too. However, if you really want to transform your life and change things to be happier than you are now, you DO need to take out the ‘me time’ so that you can reflect and think on which direction your life is taking, or what is it that you need to change in your life so that it gets better.

      Yes, the rich perhaps have more of ‘me time’,but are they really happy? I don’t think so! I think it’s not the question of rich or poor, because everyone does need to take out a little time for themselves to go within and introspect at times, even if it’s for a few minutes per day. The real thoughts, the real revolution, only comes when you spend some times with yourself and think – isn’t it?

      Thanks for stopping by and glad you liked the post 🙂

  21. A very good article, Harleena. Being a Christian, spirituality means a lot to me. Sometimes when times get hard I have to buckle down and realise I can’t do it all on my own. I need to hand it over to God.

    I find that giving back also works well to find yourself. For example, volunteering at a homeless shelter etc.,

    1. Hi Anne,

      Glad you liked the post 🙂

      Yes indeed, that’s the way it should be in-fact – hand over all your worries to Him because if things are happening, they are as there is a reason for them to happen at that very moment. That’s where acceptance comes in – isn’t it?

      It surely does, and there are so many ways you can do that, provided you are ready and willing to do so selflessly.

      Thanks for stopping by and contributing to the post 🙂

  22. Even without knowing the scientific basis behind these habits/rituals above, and just by implementing one of them, they have the potential to transform your life. The great news is that even small changes can make a significant difference. So pick one and get started today.

    1. Welcome to the blog Martin!

      Absolutely! You really don’t have to follow or adopt all these steps to transform your life, but you can certainly make a start by following a few of these and see the change it brings to your life.

      Just as you rightly mentioned, even a small change makes a huge difference, and that is what really matters – you start somewhere – isn’t it?

      Thanks for stopping by and sharing your views 🙂

  23. Hi !
    All the points are no doubt very important for any person to be happy and live a enjoyable life but what can a person do at times when he has been betrayed by the person with whom he/she trusted and had built a strong bond/relationship…how can someone forgive such person? .


    1. Hi Pramod,

      Interesting question!

      Yes, people betray our trust sometimes, and it hurts the most if we’ve had a strong relationship with them earlier. However, you’ve to learn to forgive such people because there is no other way to release yourself of the pain and suffering you go through otherwise.

      There are only two things that can happen when you are betrayed and hurt – you either hurt the person back and live with hurt and feelings or resentment all through life. The other option is that you cut off from such a person and sit and brood over it, remain negative all through, or self-harm yourself by keeping the hatred within you. The best option is to let go – to forgive such a person – let bygones be bygones.

      When you do this, you free yourself from all kinds of hatred, resentment, negative thoughts, and allow yourself to be a happier person.

      Hope this helped 🙂

      Thanks for stopping by and sharing your feelings here 🙂

  24. Hi Harleena,

    You have fantastic views about transformation in life and if anyone follows this 17 steps in their life then he/she must be successful, happy and living more life than ever before but they are not easier to accept as they requires high potential and the guy who believe in himself definitely living a happy life and having a positive attitude towards life.

    1. Hi Sudhir,

      Glad you liked these steps to transform your life 🙂

      I know it’s not easy for everyone to adopt all of these steps, but you can always make a start somewhere, and keeping adding more of these steps to your life so that eventually you are a much happier person than before – isn’t it? They don’t require high potential at all I think, and if you see Brent’s video in the post, you will see how easy it is to transform your life if you follow these steps.

      Thanks for stopping by and sharing your views.

      BTW – I wonder if you’ve tried getting yourself a Gravatar so that we all know whom we are talking to here 🙂

    1. Hi HMiMouCh – nice to have you back after long 🙂

      Glad you liked the post and found it inspiring too. It’s good if you are liking my posts, and I hope they are adding more meaning to your life.

      Thanks for stopping by. 🙂

      BTW – Do try and grab yourself a Gravatar as it would be good to know who we are talking to here 🙂

    1. Hi BK,

      Absolutely! And such is life 🙂

      Accepting what life puts forth us is the best way to be happy in your life – just be in the flow and take each day as it comes is the key.

      BTW – I was just wondering whether you’ve tried getting yourself a Gravatar, so that we all can see who we are talking to 🙂

    1. Hi Liju,

      Nice to know that you liked these tips that can help people transform their lives 🙂

      Ah…learning to forgive is the toughest I know, but there is nothing better than that too – isn’t it?

      Thanks for stopping by 🙂

  25. Hi Harleena, Great inspiring post!

    The one I always wonder about: Make the right decisions. How do you know if they are the right ones? They may seem like they are right at the time but can end up being the wrong choices.

    Interesting video about being grateful. It’s something we need to make a habit of 🙂 I love the part about willing, so many are not willing to do things but wish for things. Or blame others for it.

    #5 is so important – many go from relationship to relationship without doing #5. One must be comfortable in their own skin. So important!
    Thanks for sharing and have a great end of the week.

    1. Hi Lisa,

      Glad you liked the post, and nice to know that it inspired you 🙂

      Ah…nice question. It is tough to know whether the decision you take is the right or wrong one, for anyone. But this is something you learn with time and experience, though if it’s a decision you have to take instantly, you trust your gut or inner feeling and go with that. However, be responsbile thereafter for the decision you take, without blaming anyone or anything for it, if it doesn’t go in your favor.

      Yes, Brent’s video is motivating and I wish we follow more of what he suggested, which sounded such simple things to transform your life.

      I agree with you there, often relationships aren’t valued, and if you are married, they are sometimes neglected too, unless you keep making the effort from both sides, which is so important.

      Thanks for stopping by and contributing to the post 🙂

  26. Wow, good, GOOD tips.. and then you have this Brent Smith guy on the video and I’ve never heard of him.

    He’s amazing!

    The part about “let it go” especially resonated for me. Because it’s SO true. And he wasn’t just talking about letting go of hurt but also the outcome.

    darlene 🙂

    1. Hi Darlene,

      Nice to know that you liked the post, and yes, Brent speaks a lot of wisdom in the video 🙂

      I’d not heard of him earlier too, but when I was looking around for the apt videos, his was the best that went with the post. Absolutely! His talk about letting go made a lot of sense, more so, that’s the best option you have which transforms your life and brings you happiness.

      Thanks for stopping by and sharing your views 🙂

  27. Thanks Singh for this encouraging post.

    Yes, the first step “Believe in yourself” is a must for everyone willing to be successful in life but it is too tough to keep the phrase in mind, and the main reason behind it is nothing but too much up and down of human life.


    1. Hi Benojir,

      I’m happy that you liked this post about how you can transform your life 🙂

      I can understand what you mean, especially when we start thinking negative or when we don’t have the self confidence in ourselves. I agree that ups and downs are part of our lives, but that’s what life is – a roller coaster ride! We need to uplift ourselves from such thoughts and turn positive – that’s the only thing that works.

      Thanks for stopping by and contributing to the post 🙂

  28. Such a positive post Harleena, I loved it :).

    My favorite one was #9, change our attitude. I believe if we walk around with a negative attitude it just draws more negative stuff in.

    I got so caught up in the video, Brent’s got such an uplifting voice. I love how he said be grateful for the simple things in life.

    My advice would be to say positive affirmations. If we remind ourselves how blessed we are and how great we are that it will build up our self-confidence and reflect in all we do.

    Thanks for putting this together for us! Hope you’re having a great day Harleena!

    1. Hi Corina,

      Nice to know that you liked the post 🙂

      Absolutely! There is no shortage of negativity around us, but what matters most is how much of it do we allow to affect us. If we have a positive attitude towards life, no negativity can really touch us.

      Glad you liked Brent’s video – I was glued to it when I saw it as well, and I think he spoke so much sense.

      Yes indeed, thinking positive makes you feel positive, and such affirmations all of us need – we need such reminders to help build or self-esteem and confidence level.

      Thanks for stopping by and sharing your views 🙂

  29. Harleena, yet another wonderful write up from you.

    You just keep getting me thrilled each time I read your blog. I am glad to have known you because for every visit to your blog, there is always something positive to take home.

    This is about the best subject anywhere – finding the best way to be happy in life. Happiness is not defined by circumstances around us or by friends, job, family, food, etc; it is defined by ourselves. It is you who chooses to be either happy or sad in life. Situation could be bad, but you decide how to react to the situation.

    Accepting yourself in the face of rejection is one great tool to stay happy and never become depressed by the way others are treating you.

    Loving yourself helps you to think of the best for yourself (not being selfish anyway), and when you love yourself you would think of how best to develop youself, what best food to eat, the healthy books to read, the kind of company to keep, etc.

    If you have purpose in life, you would have a reason for living. Those who have no purpose hardly have value for life. Your purpose would give you the needed strength and courage to drive on without losing focus.

    Your attitude determines your altitude in life. Positive attitude is needed to be able to mix up effectively with others, pursue your goals, overcome challenges, etc.

    Passion; if this is missing in your life, it would be difficult to do anything and be happy. How happy you are in your job, career, etc is determined by your passion for what you do and not necessarily the pay. When all else is lost, it is the passion that keeps you moving on.

    Finally, letting go and forgiving others. I would say this is a very crucial part of happiness. You can never be happy if you keep harbouring bad feelings against someone. The moment you forgive others their offenses, happiness returns to you.

    Thank you again Harleena for this great write up. Enjoy your weekend ahead. Stay blessed.

    1. Hi Joseph,

      Wow! What a wonderful comment 🙂

      I’m glad you like the post about how to transform your life. Thanks for all the appreciation, I’m grateful to you for that. 🙂

      I’ve read somewhere that people come into our lives for a special reason – either to teach us lessons, to show us the way, or to help us. And that no meeting is purely coincidental. So, considering that supposition, you’re destined to know me so you can take back home all the goodies from my blog, right?

      And likewise, I learn so much from your blog, and I know you are another consistent writer. So, that’s how we grow learning from our blogs and by visiting other blogs too.

      It isn’t much of an irony that people struggle to be happy in their lives, and try to find it in every corner of the world. And least they know that the source of happiness lies within themselves.

      You’ve got it right – everything that we experience is a matter of our choice that we make. You made an important point about how we react to situations, and that really defines if we’ll be stressful or not. If we’re stressed then we might also be sad.

      One thing that I learned in life was to keep your “controls” or “trigger button” with and within you. In that case, neither people nor situations will be able to trigger negativity in you.

      You’ve presented some great pointers and beautifully expanded the tips for acceptance, love, purpose, attitude, passion etc. I agree with every word of what you’ve expressed here.

      “Your attitude determines your altitude in life” – that’s a good one! And you’re right about the fact that when you forgive others, you release the negative energy that you’d been holding for so long, and you feel light, relieved, and happy.

      Thanks so much for your wonderful contribution to the post – you surely added a lot of value to it. Have a great week and God bless. 🙂

      1. Fantastic Posts.

        This post exclusively for me Harleena. I am in the depressed stage with my personal problems. But this post gives me a lot of motivation to work harder. All comments here for this post exclusively is simply superb and adding colors to this post.

        Keep your good work Harleena. My best wishes always with you.

        I’ve read more than 3,500 web development blogs. But when it comes to LifeStyle. I read only few blogs (say two) one is Yahoo lifestyle and another one your blog aha-now. That’s it.

        It’s very difficult Harleena there are so many Guest Authors in Yahoo Lifestyle but here this is a one woman show. Wow you give tough – stiff fight to Yahoo lifestyle. Wow I like this fighting spirit. I also love when those people don’t give up on their life

        1. Hi Kumar,

          Glad you could relate so well to the post, and I knew you would say this was meant for you, especially all that you are going through 🙂

          I won’t ask you about your personal problems, but I do know for sure that tough times never last, tough people do, and I think you are such a person. Yes, hard work and dedication always pay, and even if things take time, they do happen provided we are patient.

          Oh yes…the readers and commenters of the blog are very generous with their comments, and that’s what I love about blogging, even though it takes me time replying to each one of them, but I do that slowly at my own pace 🙂

          Wow! Reading so many blogs is not easy, and perhaps that’s why you are loaded with so much of knowledge. Aww…it’s so kind of you to say such words, though I know I have a long way to go as yet, but with the support of friends like you, the journey becomes easier.

          Yes indeed, so far I just have one guest author per month, who is invited personally by me and is a community member of my blog. But I might change that because of the number of offers I keep getting for guest posting and sponsored posts, which I’ve not started as yet. We must keep changing and transforming ourselves for the better, isn’t it? That’s how we grow 🙂

          Thanks for stopping by and for your words of appreciation. 🙂

  30. Hello Harleena,
    You have said so much about so much on this great steps of “transforming your life to be happy” 🙂 You are just so right on point.

    The main key i follow well is; i always be my self no matter where i find my self and i always stay truthful even if it will hurt others 🙂 One more thing i love doing that keeps me happy is; follow what your heart say. I trust my heart…

    The tips you put down can truly help anybody who wish to be happy. Thanks for the lovely post my friend and do have a great week ahead…

    1. Hi Babanature,

      I guess more could be said and written about how to transform your life – it’s such a vast topic and at times very subjective one too.

      I think you take it the right way – be yourself, no matter what and where! Being such you keep receiving guidance from your inner core, and you’re in touch with your values and strengths.

      Being truthful is good and you’ll never go wrong if you follow your heart! It’s your heart and emotions that transforms you faster than your intellect and the brain. Utilizing the emotional channel brings you more happiness.

      I wish these tips help people and clear the misconception among them all that money and other material things are important to transform oneself, and be happy.

      Thanks for your contribution, and have a fabulous week ahead! 🙂

  31. Great tips and insights, Harleena.

    Maybe #18 should be a wildcard or customized step based on an individual’s own self awareness.

    What I’m getting at is that a lot of us (I know it’s true for me) keep having to learn and re-learn our own specific lesson.

    For me (OK – I probably have more than one!) it’s about getting out of my own way.

    Call it the ego, the conscious mind, whatever – the part of me that sets the goal is not same part of me that has the limitless power to achieve the goal.

    Sometimes – a lot of the time – I get in my own way, and then I get frustrated when I’m unable to accomplish things or achieve change by conscious willpower alone. Rather, I would be much better off trusting a less visible process that’s amply proven itself to me in the past.

    1. Hi Brad,

      I’m glad you like the steps to transform your life to find happiness 🙂

      You’re absolutely right – though I’ve presented these tips as generalized, they do vary from person to person. Every individual has different ability and capability to face the lessons of life.

      I, for that matter, have also made many mistakes and had to re-learn to get things right – I think it’s a common case with all of us.

      If you feel your ego obstructs the process of your life transformation, then you need to deal with it. Yes, only will power does not work alone all the time, you need to consider many other aspects too.

      It’s also difficult to move out of your comfort zone – the further you move, more the insecurities and problems you’ve in life.

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts and view, I appreciate them. 🙂

Previous Article
A lady blogger giving blogging tips to create your own blog

Blogging for Beginners: How to Create Your Own Blog in 5 Steps

Next Article
one of the alcoholic parents drinking beer

Alcoholic Dad: My Story of Living with an Alcoholic Father

Related Posts