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Accept Change & Adjust to Life


By with 51 comments
a woman accepts and adjust to life and shows happiness with hands in sky

How many of us can truly accept change? Do we really adjust to life willingly, if we do so? These questions do make me wonder that when we accept change & adjust to life, do we become happier or do we curb our desires and wishes and feel forced to accept the change.

I remember the time when I was in college and had to move out of my parent’s house to the hostel, it took me a lot of time to accept the change and adjust to the new surroundings and people.

Similarly, whenever there had been major changes in my life, it took me time to accept the change and adjust to life. Of course, with time, I was able to just go with the flow and take the changes as they came.

As of now, I gladly welcome and accept change and have learnt to adjust to life, as it always makes me a much happier and content person. I especially loved this quote as it relates to me a great deal, and it’s something I mostly follow now-

“There are things I can’t force. I must adjust. There are times when the greatest change needed is a change of my viewpoint.” ~ Denis Diderot

Change is everywhere and it happens, whether we want it or not. Some people welcome the new change and find the new ways to turn the unexpected into a chance for growth and development, while others may become frightened and react negatively.

While we learn to accept change and adjust to life, we are confronted with unforeseen changes in our lives. Our first reaction may be to either run away from it or fight against it, which are inborn survival instincts and occur when we may feel threatened.

Once you are able to mentally adapt to a situation, you can formulate a plan and implement it by adjusting to the situation. A person who can accept change and adjust to life is the one who is able to focus the mind in new directions and make choices based on his or her desired outcomes.

“Happy is he who learns to bear what he cannot change.” ~ J. C. F. von Schiller

Nonetheless, adapting to change is difficult for most people because humans are creatures of habit, and having to change our behavior and pattern is annoying and frustrating, and takes us out of our comfort zones.

How can you accept change and adjust to life?

Most people are not able to accept change and adjust to life and that causes them pain, as they believe that their expectations should always be met or that life should always be stable. This is not the way life works.

Change is a normal part of everyone’s life and it’s normal to face new and unexpected situations in life. You need to simply let go, learn to adjust & accept the change by changing your strategy to adapt to the new situation.

“We cannot change anything unless we accept it.” ~ Carl Jung

Mentioned below are a few ways that can help you accept change as it comes and adjust to life.

1- Analyze the situation

Give yourself time to analyze the situation by viewing the circumstances and actions from various angles to gain accurate understanding of what has happened.

Communicate your concerns, ask questions, and seek answers if people are involved, as this allows you to make informed choices.

2- Remove the negative options

If something bad happens, your subconscious mind searches for the available questions and answers. You need to remove such negative options of getting disappointed or becoming depressed, if the change isn’t as you wanted it to be.

“If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude.” ~ Maya Angelou

Remove negative thoughts and doubts, be optimistic, and you will find that you are able to handle changes in your life more easily.

3- Change the way you approach your problems

Whenever you are overwhelmed with problems in your life, or feel low and depressed, don’t feel bad- but just try to change the way you approach your problems. Try to work harder, study more, be flexible, think from a new angle, start all over again, and don’t forget to pray to God!

“When it is obvious that the goals cannot be reached, don’t adjust the goals, adjust the action steps.” ~ Confucius

Remember, any change that occurs in your life, also affects those around you. Thus, learn to accept change by adapting to it and adjust to life. Change happens for a reason, and the faster you are able to adapt and move on, the better it will be for you and those around you.

4- Take it as a continuous learning process

Change is a constant in all our lives, and the skills required to meet various needs keep changing throughout our lives. When we accept change, we keep learning new things along the way in areas of self-care, parenting, relationships, financial, and others.

So, when you take change as a positive, continuous learning process, you are able to adjust to life in a better way.

5- Welcome challenges

Adjusting and accepting change brings challenging situations, which gives us a chance to grow wiser and more skillful. Be adventurous and take on the change as a challenge.

Expect change to occur every second, minute, or hour. And the best way to face up to or accept change is to be prepared for it, and make the best out of it.

Remember, that every situation that seems most devastating, carries with it the seed of a new blessing, and those who seek these blessings- will eventually find them.

6- Be patient

When you have to accept change, sometimes you may want to get it over with and move on as fast as possible. But the cycle of change often takes longer than you expect, as the change has to be analyzed, communicated, integrated, and time is required to adjust to it as well.

You need to be patient and let the change happen and accept it happily.

7- Let go

Finally, you need to let go of the past in order to accept change & adjust to life, so that you can remain optimistic and create the future you want.

“If we don’t change, we don’t grow. If we don’t grow, we aren’t really living.” ~ Gail Sheehy

Imagine sitting in a movie hall and watching a movie and all of a sudden the lights went out. You may not see anything for a few seconds but gradually you start seeing the objects around you. This is because your eyes begin to accept the change and adjust to the darkness. Similarly, you need to adapt and find new solutions to the problems or situations you encounter.

Remember, managing change and uncertainty can be much easier when you adapt your thinking and adjust to life by accepting the new methods, tactics, and strategies to manage change and uncertainty.

Are you able to accept change and adjust to life easily? What problems, if any, do you come across when you try to adjust to life as you accept the changes? Share in the comments below.

 

 

Photo Credit: Andy Newson




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About Harleena Singh

Harleena Singh is a positive thinker and a freelance writer. She loves to write inspiring and thought provoking posts on self-improvement, family, relationships, health, and other aspects of life. She's not another personal development guru, but just an average person with great life experiences. She's also a blogger, who loves to share her blogging knowledge and experiences. Network with her on Twitter, Facebook, and Google+..

51 Comments

  1. Steve Rice

    January 20, 2012 at 10:10 pm

    I love the quote from Jung about having first to accept something before it can change.

    I hold a firm belief that when we are in a place of “non-resistance” to adversity, then it will quickly flow through our experience with the momentum of the normal flow of life energy. This quote really shows that.

    I also like your tips but especially the last one: Let go. So hard to do sometimes, but so important.

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      Harleena Singh

      January 20, 2012 at 10:35 pm

      Glad you liked the post and quote Steve!

      I like your explanation about the quote, as I also feel that Jung’s quote does make a lot of sense, as if we want to change something, we need to accept it first, adapt to it and then make the changes we wish.

      Yes indeed, letting go is the toughest thing for anyone. It is so easy to keep things within us or feel bad about them, but to forgive, forget, and let go are the toughest, but yet so important- if you want your own personal growth.

      Thanks for stopping-by. :)

  2. Adrienne

    January 21, 2012 at 12:00 am

    When I started reading this it took me back to some very unpleasant times in my life where change was thrown at me and I was not prepared at all. Had I known then what I know now, I sure would have handled it a lot better. Oh, it still would have hurt horribly but I think I would have processed it better.

    I know for me that I was always uncomfortable with change because it’s different. I hate it when I have no control whatsoever with what’s taking place. You know, that the decisions were made for us without our consent. But knowing that you have no control over the situation and doing nothing but stressing out about it just makes matters worse. Change is inevitable so we just need to learn how to accept it.

    I do my best today to live more in the present moment and accept what is other then constantly fight it. I have a former friend dealing with some of this right now who has not learned these lessons so she’s going to have a tough go at this.

    Thanks for this post today Harleena. Very comforting for me to be able to look back at where I use to be and where I am now and see just how far I’ve come regarding this subject. What an awesome feeling too.

    Have a beautiful day Harleena and a wonderful weekend. We’ll catch up again soon.

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      Harleena Singh

      January 21, 2012 at 8:34 pm

      Glad you could resonate with the post Adrienne!

      Sorry to hear that the post reminded you of your unpleasant past, though am glad you have learnt to overcome that past and are into a much better and promising present and future.

      A lot depends upon our age and how we adapt to things when we are at that age. When we are younger, we are not as wise nor do we have that deep an understanding about things, and change is something that works only if and when you are willing to accept and adjust to it. So, don’t feel bad about what would have been at that point of your life, as you were not of that age to be able to really understand things as you are today.

      Yes indeed, that was the case with me as well. At some points in my life, there were others making the decisions of my life, which left me out of control, powerless, deflated, and stressed out. Because change was so different and something that took me out of my comfort zone, it was not easily acceptable- until much later when I planned to change after having realized that it was merely causing me frustration, pain, and suffering. And now when I am able to adapt myself, adjust, and accept the change- it makes me feel so much better internally.

      I guess living in the present and in the moment is what works best. This is something that your former friend should also learn to do. Hope she doesn’t have much of a tough time, and with you there to guide her through, am sure she would come out clear of it. :)

      Nice to know that you feel nice about your journey from where you were and where you have reached today- hope the happiness always grows in your life.

      Thanks so stopping-by and adding so much more value to the post by sharing your experiences with everyone. Have a great weekend as well :)

  3. Hiten

    January 21, 2012 at 12:27 am

    Hi Harleena,

    Thanks for writing this post on accepting change. I agree for many people, this is very difficult to do. However, learning do so means one is one the path to freedom. I mean, when one looks at themselves, their life, others and the world, it’s all changing. We were once a baby, then a child, then a teenager and then an adult. Everything is constantly changing.

    It takes courage and effort to make the switch, especially when all one knows is to try to hold onto both internal and external things for so long, but is well worth it. When one accepts change in them and around them, one start to experience less heartache and disappointment, because one is wise of the fact that it was going to change anyway!

    I reckon the most constant thing in the world is change.

    Take care,

    Hiten

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      Harleena Singh

      January 21, 2012 at 8:19 pm

      Glad you could relate to the post Hiten!

      You are so right in describing change as a continuous process. We are forever changing, just that the change at times is not visible to us. From a baby we grow to become a child, then a teenager, an adult, and then grow old also- this is all a physical change that takes place, though brings about a mental shift in thoughts as well.

      I guess the sincere and deliberate effort when and if you want to change yourself, works wonders for yourself- internally and externally. And you can easily change yourself- but only if you want to- and if you are willing to adapt and adjust to people, surroundings, or life around you :)

      Yes indeed, when we accept the changes around us, we experience less of heartaches, pains, disappointments, and frustrations, and are more content and happy.

      Thanks so much for stopping-by, and have a wonderful weekend :)

  4. Deeone

    January 21, 2012 at 3:52 am

    Awesome post Harleena,

    Change is certainly something that takes some getting used too. Over time I’ve gotten a lot better adjusting to it. I was horrible at it when I was younger. Temper tantrum, fits, pouting… let’s just say, it didn’t sit well with me.

    Then I started seeing a pattern with the changes I faced in my life. The most noticable thing was that most of the changes that occurred, eventually was for the best anyway. And down the road it actually worked out in my favor.

    It didn’t happen that way every time, but the times it did really outnumbered the times it didn’t. This quote is absolutely true….“If we don’t change, we don’t grow. If we don’t grow, we aren’t really living.” Gail nailed that, and thank you for sharing it and all of the other’s with us, my friend.

    I think that you didn’t miss one thing concerning changes and adjustments to them. They are life’s way of keeping us on our toes. ;)

    Thanks for the awesomeness, my friend. Great read!

    Another thing I noticed, each time it happened I grew in some way, shape or form.

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      Harleena Singh

      January 21, 2012 at 8:05 pm

      Glad you liked the post Deeone!

      Change does require lots of time getting used to, but it does happen eventually- provided you are ready to adapt and adjust yourself to it. I guess most of us must have been like you- not willingly ready to change :)

      I guess you must have made that deliberate effort to change yourself first, adapted and adjusted to your surroundings or people, and then the eventual change must have taken place within you.

      Nice to know that you changed, whether it was in shape, form, or from within- as long as there was a good positive change, it does wonders to you. It does take its own time- but nice to learn that it happened and made you what you are today.

      I love quotes, as I feel they add so much more value to the posts- and yes- it is so rightly mentioned that if we don’t change, we really don’t grow and progress in life.

      Thanks for stopping-by and adding so much value to the post :)

  5. Hajra

    January 21, 2012 at 3:57 am

    Hey Harleen (wait, are you Harleen or Harleena?)

    Love the topic. I am a psychologist and we talk about change all the time. But what many people fail to realize that change takes time. It takes a lot of courage and effort to have actually accepted that we need to change, we need to imbibe that and we need to work on it.

    It will work but you need to work on it!

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      Harleena Singh

      January 21, 2012 at 7:15 pm

      Nice to have you back Hajra!

      Well I was named ‘Harleen’, but as my nickname was ‘Leena’ (easier to pronounce!), my name too changed to ‘Harleena’! So, you could call me either of the two :)

      Ah…being a psychologist this surely would be the most talked about topic! Yes indeed, adapting and adjusting to change- does take time, and that is why we need to be patient and let it happen gradually.

      Yes indeed, efforts surely have to be put into adapting yourself to accept the change, and having really worked myself through this process, I know it’s not easy. Yet, it is not impossible also- if you want to be a happier and more content person- just change yourself :)

      Thanks for stopping-by and sharing your own experiences with everyone :)

  6. Burl

    January 21, 2012 at 5:43 am

    It is often said that the only constant in the world is change and learning to accept it and even use it to help you become a better person is a laudable goal! Thanks for this great post!

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      Harleena Singh

      January 21, 2012 at 7:07 pm

      Welcome to the blog Burl!

      Absolutely! The only constant in the world is change, and this is something no one can stop- it is bound to take place, whether we like it or not. Best way is to accept it and adjust your life to the new change, willingly and happily.

      Glad you liked the post, and thanks so much for stopping-by. :)

  7. Jack

    January 21, 2012 at 7:27 am

    I am slow to accept change but I have found that following some of your suggestions helps. When I view life as a journey/adventure it makes it less difficult.

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      Harleena Singh

      January 21, 2012 at 7:01 pm

      Glad you could resonate with the post Jack!

      Most of us do take our own sweet time accepting change, as its really not very easy to really let go of things. I guess taking life as a journey, or even taking one single day as it comes- makes it all the more adventurous and something to look forward to. Makes it easier to adjust to life :)

      Thanks for stopping-by and have a great weekend :)

  8. Sampathkumar Iyengar

    January 21, 2012 at 10:12 am

    A great post and a lesson in change management, keep up the good work.

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      Harleena Singh

      January 21, 2012 at 6:58 pm

      Welcome to the blog Sampathkumar!

      Glad you liked the post and the lessons about change management. I guess we are forever changing and the post talks a little about how we can get better and adjust to life.

      Thanks for stopping-by. :)

  9. Teresa Cypher

    January 23, 2012 at 5:21 am

    Wow! This is a great post, Harleena!

    I really like the way you infused quotes throughout. Letting go…that is so difficult. But that is also a part of forgiveness,and without letting go, we can grow bitter. I digress.

    And I am a huge Gail Sheehy fan. Loved your choice of her quote.

    The most beautiful part of this post is the string of comments to which you replied–each and every one. People reaching out to people.

    I know you are busy, but I wanted to let you know that I listed you as a recipient of the “Sweetest Blog Award.” I know they are time consuming to do, and realize that many don’t have the time to respond. :-) But wanted to let you know that I posted your link and a very spot-on description of this blog.

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      Harleena Singh

      January 23, 2012 at 11:15 pm

      Glad you liked the post Teresa!

      I simply love adding quotes to the posts, guess they add so much more value to them. And am happy you are a fan of Gail Sheehy as well :)

      I value my readers and friends who spend time reading the posts and leaving their valuable comments. And the least I can do is reply to their comments, and it is almost like I am hearing them and replying to them personally when I do so.

      Wow! Thanks so much for the nomination and honor Teresa- I am indeed humbled and honored! I like the name of the award- ‘Sweetest Blog Award”- and would surely pass on the torch to other deserving bloggers. Yes, they are indeed time consuming but worth the effort and recognition :)

      Thanks so much once again for stopping-by and for the nomination. I would surely take out the time sometime next week and write a post about it to pass it on to other deserving bloggers. :)

  10. Justin Mazza

    January 24, 2012 at 1:49 am

    Hi Harleena,

    I get why most people don’t welcome change but I have come to accept that change is inevitable in our lives. Most people want to stay in their comfort zones the problem is life becomes stagnant this way. So for me I welcome change as a nice way to change the status quo. Some change we can control and some are outside of our control. We gotta go with it and change what we can and accept what we can.

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      Harleena Singh

      January 24, 2012 at 1:32 pm

      Glad you could resonate with the post Justin!

      Yes indeed, change is inevitable in our livers and is something that is bound to happen, whether we like it or not. I agree with you about not staying in our comfort ones and moving out to accept life and face new challenges. Such kind of a change is a great learning experience for all of us.

      The changes we can control and those within our reach are easy to handle, but the real challenge lies in accepting the changes that are outside of our control- the ones we are unprepared for. I guess if you can learn to accept those, and with a willing heart- you are able to achieve a great deal in life.

      Thanks so much for stopping-by. :)

  11. Jonathan Gaurano

    January 24, 2012 at 9:46 am

    Hi Harleena:

    I hear this over and over again. This is a common ideology that many people know, but do not practice. Why? Because change, for many, is a very hard thing to accept. For example, look at the civil rights movement and how hard it was for change to take place. Also, another example, the complaints people have when facebook/twitter change their site’s layout.

    Change is hard.

    I think what people need to be reminded is this: Why fight over change when history shows that the social change that was created in the past – have become the norm of the present.

    I think once people understand the aforementioned statement – they will accept and participate in – more change.

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      Harleena Singh

      January 24, 2012 at 1:45 pm

      You are quite right there Jonathan!

      Most people know a lot about change and that they should ideally accept it, though very few are really able to follow it. Yes indeed, it is very tough to accept change and be willing to adapt to it willingly as well.

      I like your examples and change is of course hard, and worse still is if you are unprepared for a sudden change. However, life is smoother and much better if you can adapt and adjust yourself to the change. I guess it makes you a happier person from within.

      Thanks so much for sharing your wonderful examples and for stopping-by. :)

  12. Ilka Flood

    January 25, 2012 at 2:17 am

    Hi Harleena,

    7 great tips to make change easier. Well, life is full of changes. Some we welcome and some we fight. But, in the end they still happen so we might as well approach them with an open mind and…adjust.

    I know there have been times in my life when I was fighting changes tooth and nail. It only made me miserable. If I had accepted it in the first place I would have saved myself a lot of misery. Of course as I got older just accepting change has become a lot easier. It’s for a reason that as you get older you get wiser, haha.

    Thank you for sharing this wonderful post!

    Be blessed,

    Ilka

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      Harleena Singh

      January 25, 2012 at 10:30 am

      Glad you could resonate with the post Ilka!

      Yes indeed, life is full of change and it happens every second whether we like it or not. Some would be god and acceptable, while others we may not like or welcome. But at the end of the day, accepting and adjusting to any kind of change by being mentally prepared for it is what really counts.

      I guess when we are younger we do tend to defy things and are not willing to adapt or adjust to new change. We prefer our own comfort level, views and thoughts, and are unwilling to take life as it comes. It’s much later we realize- just like you did, that had we adjusted to change earlier, we would have been much happier today or it would have saved us from a lot of misery.

      With age and time of course, we do mature and get better at adapting to change and adjusting to life. I guess we learn the hard-way :)

      Thanks for stopping-by. :)

  13. Cris Marston

    January 25, 2012 at 2:34 am

    I sure appreciated this post as I struggle a bit with accepting change, especially if it isn’t something I desire.

    When I was growing up I had to accept and adjust to many difficult situations. I think as a child we are more resilient to change, and find that survival mode in play to move us forward. Getting married, and then having children brought a good many changes and opportunities to “accept” them and make the best of it…good, bad, ugly. Still, no problem with acceptance….in terms of moving forward with my life.

    There are always those “changes” that we are hit with that are difficult at best, and life altering. But finding the “attitude of gratitude” In all things helped immensely.My dilemma now is I am finding to be not readily accepting of some changes that have come my way, and feel like I am a salmon swimming upstream to get things back to the “status quo” as it were. Even though I am quick to say…”It is what it is” and “Let go, Let God” I still find myself digging in my heels.

    This was a good reminder to take a breath, accept what is, and look for the learning and growing opportunities the “change” offers.
    Maybe I need the “change” of lounging on a tropical beach for a couple of weeks to assess my attitude. ;-)

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      Harleena Singh

      January 25, 2012 at 11:48 am

      Welcome to the blog Cris!

      Glad you liked the post and could relate to it. Most of us do have a hard time accepting and adjusting to change, especially if its something different from what we really want or like.

      When we are young we have our own mood swings, whims and fancies and refrain from adjusting to change as it moves us out of our comfort level. And just as you mentioned after you get married, have children and as we grow older, we learn to accept and adapt to the new changes life brings forth us.

      Yes, it does happen at times that certain changes are unacceptable to us, may be we have our own rigid thoughts about some things and are not ready to really let go and accept the change. I guess in such cases, try waiting for a while and distract yourself to doing other things and then come back to view the change from a new perspective or a new set of eyes. Hopefully, you would be willing to accept the change then.

      Lounging on a tropical beach for a few weeks or simply a nice get away from the daily rut of life is a great idea for a change :)

      Thanks for stopping-by. :)

  14. Corinne Rodrigues

    January 25, 2012 at 11:51 am

    This is a topic I particularly love!

    I don’t know how you feel, but having an Army background trains us early how to adapt to change, doesn’t it?

    I remember reading Gail Sheehy’s ‘Passages’ many years ago and was struck by how much people can suffer when being resistant to change. For me, change has been a constant in life and every time I open myself up to change, I grow and learn.

    Thanks for this great post, Harleena!

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      Harleena Singh

      January 25, 2012 at 12:02 pm

      Glad you like this topic Corinne!

      I feel the same way as well being from an Army background. I guess with my dad getting posted to various places all the time, we have literally learned to live through any situation and adjust to life by adapting ourselves to change. It came rather naturally to us.

      However, once we grew a little and got married into the civil and had kids, certain things took a backseat. ( I guess we were too used to moving around and changing to different places! Lols :))

      Yes indeed, people do suffer internally more than anything when they resist or fight the change. There are no two ways about it that if you accept the changes in your life as they come, one day at a time, you are going to be a much content and happier person. And yes, you do grow, learn, and evolve into a much better person.

      Thanks so much for stopping-by. :)

  15. Praveen Rajarao

    January 26, 2012 at 2:01 am

    Harleena – Wonderful post and nicely laid out steps to handle change.

    My biggest change in life was when we moved to US. I was with my wife and we moved into a new empty home with 4 suitcases. Had to setup everything from scratch which we never do in India, we always have our parents or family to help us out and never bother much to do ourselves.

    Of course as you have mentioned, we got used to it over time and now we are experts in being independent :-)

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      Harleena Singh

      January 27, 2012 at 11:14 am

      Glad you liked the post Praveen!

      I can well imagine the massive change in everything including culture and adjusting to your new life and surroundings when you must have moved to the U.S. Starting everything right from scratch is not an easy thing to do, especially when you leave your roots and move away from your parents and folks. Your life sure must be full of changes at every step -leaving you with no option than to willingly adjust to the change, which must have now lead you to feeling much at home there.

      Yes, we all do get used to accepting the changes around us, though if we remain unhappy inside it causes lots of stress, worry, and frustration. Guess accepting the change happily and willingly does wonders to you within!

      Thanks for stopping-by and sharing your experiences with everyone. :)

  16. Joanne Cipressi

    January 26, 2012 at 9:52 am

    Harleena,

    I sure love this article. You know very well that I am an advocate of change. Change to me is fun and exciting. I love stepping out of the box and discovering what else is there is. When we change we learn much about the world, others and ourselves. In my opinion, change is one of the best gifts we can give ourselves. Yet so many people fear it. I think these tips are excellent for those that are not changing due to fear or worry. I hope many people read this and learn from what you are sharing. Hugs!! Joanne

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      Harleena Singh

      January 27, 2012 at 11:08 am

      Glad you could resonate with the post Joanne!

      I sure do know well enough that you are an advocate of change and manage it so well, having learnt to adapt to it in your life. It shows in your posts so well :)

      Yes indeed, when we are willing to adapt to the change and adjust ourselves to the people, surroundings, and ourselves, we DO learn a great deal. However, it doesn’t really come easy to most people.

      The fear of changing or adjusting to the new change keep people away from knowing the joys there are in changing yourself, as it just makes you better than before.

      Thanks so much for stopping-by and adding more value to the post. :)

  17. Bryce Christiansen

    January 27, 2012 at 4:55 am

    Hi Harleena,

    I loved the article. It reminded me of my thoughts while writing the Camo article below.

    Life is full of change and adapting to those changes is an art that’s tough to master.
    It can stress even the best of us. I loved your point on changing the way you handle problems.

    Having that ability to adapt our behavior takes energy but sometimes it can lead to our most desired outcomes. Like your boss giving you a raise, your wife letting you go golf, or a daughter who knows how to get her way every time with those puppy eyes of hers.

    Great points.

    Bryce

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      Harleena Singh

      January 27, 2012 at 11:03 am

      Glad you liked the article Bryce!

      Yes indeed, life is full of change, and things do change every second. But adapting and adjusting to that change is what is the most challenging of all. If we are really not willing to adapt ourselves, it does lead to a lot of stress, frustration, and internal turmoil.

      You are so right about saying that we need to have the ability to adapt our behavior, which requires energy- though can result in our most desired outcomes. Love your examples as well :)

      Thanks for stopping-by. :)

  18. Vidya Sury

    January 27, 2012 at 9:17 pm

    Here’s one of my favorite quotes by Mark Twain “20 years from now you will be disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the one’s you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”

    Change is challenging and sometimes difficult – as someone who lived in four cities and went through five different schools by Grade 10 – I’ve experienced the happies and the sads – learning to adjust and embrace it makes things so much better.

    Very nice post, Harleena!

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      Harleena Singh

      January 28, 2012 at 12:28 am

      Ah..love that quote Vidya!

      Yes indeed, a new change always takes time and is difficult to accept, especially if the change is not readily acceptable to us. I can well imagine the change that comes about once you are shifting around in cities and changing schools. You must have experienced quite a bit of ups and downs, and made so many adjustments.

      I feel by accepting changes, no matter how hard or tough they are- we are able to make peace with our inner self in a better way.

      Glad you liked the post, and thanks so much for stopping-by. :)

  19. Linda

    January 29, 2012 at 11:55 am

    Change is really hard but I am trying and have accomplished several things over the past several years.
    1. I used to get really mad at everything – I am much calmer now and it feels great
    2. I used to be the most impatient person ever, but I am so patient now, for the most part – it’s weird..lol
    3. I used to be a really negative person, but I realized it was because I was with the WRONG crowd!! I try really hard to stay positive, but it is not as easy as most say it is – still have my negatives, but they pass quickly :)
    4. Used to be depressed all the time – I think you see the pattern here because they all play with one another, I still have those days, but nothing like they used to be!

    Now, I have a lot more to change, but all in time and a person has to change because they want to, not because other’s want them or they never will (in my experience).

    Excellent post here, Harleena!
    Linda

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      Harleena Singh

      January 29, 2012 at 3:13 pm

      Glad you could resonate with the post Linda!

      Yes indeed, change is really hard and not something most people can willingly accept as it takes a lot of time, patience and understanding to adapt and adjust to the changes brought about in life.

      Nice to learn about the wonderful changes you have brought about in your life, which have made you a much better and calmer person. I guess you have learnt how to adjust to the changes and accept them willingly, which gives a lot of inner peace and contentment.

      I totally agree with you when you say that the willingness to change should come from within you where YOU want the change to occur, not because others want you to change or they tell you to change. It doesn’t work that way and sometime even has an adverse effect.

      Thanks so much for stopping-by and adding so much value to the post. :)

  20. Samantha Bangayan

    January 29, 2012 at 1:09 pm

    This is a really interesting post to me, Harleena, because it had me reflecting on all the change that has been a part of my life. I think I’ve always been a restless person, so I’ve often brought change upon myself and that has taught me to go with the flow more. I love your point about taking change as a continuous learning process and that’s really how we should view life. Change is inevitable, so it comes down to how we react. =) We can make life easier for ourselves!

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      Harleena Singh

      January 29, 2012 at 2:29 pm

      Glad you could resonate to the post Samantha!

      I can well understand all that you must have adapted to and adjusted to while your travel and stay at Peru- those are wonderful changes. And if you have been a restless person as you mentioned, you must have enjoyed the change you brought about in yourself to make these adjustments in life.

      When we take change to be a continuous process, I think we are able to adjust more easily to it as we are prepared that it’s going to happen whether we like it or not. And if its going to happen, why not enjoy and welcome the change that life brings forth. :)

      Thanks for stopping-by. :)

  21. Cat Alexandra

    February 3, 2012 at 10:58 am

    Dear Harleena,

    I’ve just been perusing your blog some more to get better acquainted with you. I have truly enjoyed this particular post of yours.

    There is so much peace to be made in our lives when we can accept that change is inevitable. Life ebbs and flows, it is not meant to be static. Til we understand and accept this, we are attempting to work against the flow of life and it is indeed a futile effort…not to mention dizzying and unfulfilling!

    Being a student of life’s change, being moved by it and allowing it to move through us allows us to be the vessels we truly are. We may experience and share so much more with the world when we work in flow.

    Thank you for sharing your wisdom into this, Harleena. The message holds a special place in my heart!

    Cat Alexandra

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      Harleena Singh

      March 12, 2012 at 10:53 pm

      Sorry to have missed out on replying to your comment Cat- somehow slipped by :)

      Glad you enjoyed the post! Yes, you are so right that when we are willingly ready to accept things as they are and adapt to the change, we are much more at peace with our own-selves.

      You do need to remain in the flow of life and let the changes come in, as those are the ones that give you the courage to face all storms, yet stand strong- isn’t it?

      Thanks for stopping by :)

  22. Jon Mertz

    February 3, 2012 at 8:50 pm

    Great post, Harleena!

    The 7 steps you outline are valuable. Change is going to happen, so we need to adapt what the force of life already delivers. To be a force in our life, we need to adapt change from time-to-time.

    Thanks!
    Jon

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      Harleena Singh

      February 3, 2012 at 10:36 pm

      Glad you could resonate with the post Jon!

      Yes indeed, change is inevitable and it will happen, whether we like it or not. And the best way is to adapt and adjust to the change and willingly accept it.

      Thanks for stopping-by. :)

  23. Daniel Lombardi

    February 20, 2012 at 5:13 pm

    An amazing post Harleena,

    In my opinion No. 3 “Change the way you approach your problems” is the most difficult part of all. Like anything else in life, a person must understand that in order to get different results he must react differently. We are programmed in a certain way. When unexpected and unpleasant things happen, our direct response is set on autopilot (at least for the first moments) and usually it is pure panic. My way is first to relax, understand the problem and then look for the right person or expert in that field that can give me the right solution.

    All the best,
    Daniel

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      Harleena Singh

      February 20, 2012 at 5:58 pm

      Welcome to the blog Daniel!

      Glad you liked the post! Yes indeed, changing the way we approach your problems is the toughest part, though if we are able to do so- we are much happier and content within.

      It is human nature to react to things differently when we are first faced with problems, though once we are able to adapt to the change and accept it or take it in our stride, things become better.

      You way is ideally a nice way to accept the change, though not everyone can relax or try to understand the change, if the change is not as per their liking. I guess the deeper understanding comes from within our own selves, we need to make that deliberate effort to be willing to accept whatever changes come in our lives, as that is the only thing that prepares us for unforeseen circumstances and evolves us into better humans.

      Thanks for stopping-by. :)

  24. Jennifer Cunningham

    June 10, 2013 at 2:54 am

    Hi Harleena,

    I’m not sure that you even read or respond to comment on a post 6 months old. But I definitely got a major point from this post. Sometimes the greatest change needed is a change in your attitude. Change is a part of life and should be accepted with pleasure. The fear of the unknown future can make us react very negatively as you said. Flexibility and a willingness to let go makes change much less stressful. You have said all of this in your post and it makes it easy to refer to the steps for accepting change.

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      Harleena Singh

      June 11, 2013 at 12:43 am

      Hi Jennifer,

      Oh yes…I do because each post and the comments I get on them is important for me, and you are most welcome to comment on any of them even if they are old ones :)

      I agree with you there – the biggest change in changing the way you look at things, or as you mentioned in your attitude. Change will happen whether we like it or not, so, it does make sense to accept it happily and learn to adapt to the change as well. Yes, if the change isn’t what you like, it becomes a little tough to deal with it. But then you are always learning something even from that unpleasant change and that would only help you you grow more as a person.

      Thanks for stopping by and sharing your views :)

  25. Mandy

    August 8, 2013 at 4:46 pm

    Hi I think this is a great post.

    I have recently got married and although I am very happy in my marriage I am still finding it difficult to adjust to change in my life even though this should be a happy change for me! From living with parents and being care free to having responsibility as a wife and daughter in law and suddenly life becoming more hectic was not something I prepared for! I am trying my best now to adjust and go with the flow but still find it hard sometimes and miss my old carefree life before I got married!

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      Harleena Singh

      August 8, 2013 at 5:36 pm

      Welcome to the blog Mandy!

      I can understand your feelings and this is something that does happen when you are newly married. The acceptance comes with time, once you are with your partner for a while, but it does come if you are both open with each other. Oh yes..for a woman it IS a drastic change, and being a woman myself, I can say that it is not easy because you are tied down with additional responsibilities, but that’s what is life – you enter into a different phase of your life and a new kind of chapter starts for you. You have to accept change and adjust to life to be happy, or else it does become tough. I know you must be missing your carefree days and that is very normal too, but take it kind of a new challenge, and adapt yourself to the new surroundings, and find a friend in your husband, in-laws, and other family members and you would be fine.

      Thanks for stopping by and sharing your feelings :)

  26. Dr. Nicolas Rao

    November 1, 2014 at 2:49 pm

    Harleena, the subjects you write about touch my heart instantly.
    I love the one on taking care of elders, wanted to quote but got led astray with my unruly mind.
    It was beautiful. However, I digress.

    How I wish that it was possible to adjust to change by using the age old adage. ” For things to change, you need to change first.” It is true and with my varied and life with so many ups and downs, only adapting and seeing the divine process has given me complete peace about many things.

    At the moment, the most difficult change I am finding difficult to adapt to, is age and the failing body systems along with it. The mind is young and everyday new ambitions are added.

    How many of these changing dreams will actually come true or not is something I watch like a movie. It happens to someone else and I am the viewer.

    There are times to rejoice and times to accept and say to yourself OK! That dream is a bit too ambitious. For example my desire to take photographs on a fisherman’s log catamaran has long been my desire. I have gone to sea with them on many an occasion, but in those days could never get a camera that would take the saltwater beating that it would receive. Yes! There was equipment available but far out of reach of an average Indian.

    Today one can get a excellent waterproof with video camera for around 350$, but yours truly cannot endure a 6 or 7 hour ride on a bunch of logs tied together. So instead of moping about it. I create digital art instead. I am not lost completely however, as my youngest daughter has just done the whole bit and is on Fox Life. Sky diving and Scuba with video cameras. The joy is now vicarious but still very enjoyable.

    These are just some examples I am laying out in the need to adjust. Something all people need to do, not only with others but also with their own dreams and hopes.

    Age is of course the greatest vista of battle, but that too can be managed PG!

    Loved you excellent post as usual.

    All the best.
    Nick

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