I can associate my mother with just two words- ‘fighting cancer’. Never have I seen such a brave and courageous lady as her.
Even though she knew she had cancer, she never revealed a single frown. She simply lay there bearing her pain with utmost strength, never complaining and simply giving us strength.
After we discovered she was diagnosed with lung cancer, we did all we could, just as all loving families do.
My father picked up Reiki (a Japanese technique for stress reduction and relaxation that also promotes healing), so he could comfort my mother’s pain.
We all managed to throw in our efforts- prayed, went to religious places, tried herbal medicines etc, but like they say- it was destiny.
However, the question that we all asked the Almighty was – why her? Why do bad things happen to good people?
After a few days we realized, that perhaps our God fell short of good people and needed them up above. That being the reason he called my mother there.
The news was broken to me much later after the detection; maybe because I am an emotional person, my mother knew what sadness I would under go.
It was hard to believe at first, and some how I did not want to believe it. I kept putting it aside, not letting the thought enter my mind.
I always felt that it could not happen, and even if the doctors said so, she would be alright sooner or later. There were times when my heart could see the pain she was under going, but my mind would simply shelve it aside.
My mother never displayed what she went through. It is a known fact that cancer patients suffer a lot, more so after chemotherapy.
As she lived with us for a few months during her treatment, I never once saw her cry in pain or utter a single negative word. I still remember the days when her hair started falling, due to the chemotherapy.
She would use a wig so that we wouldn’t see the difference. She made it look so natural, and dressed normally as before.
My mother had utmost faith in God, and He has been the one who has helped her overcome all the pain and grief. Even during her last few days, when she was talking less, she was always smiling.
She could hear us talk, and even though she lost the strength to speak, her eyes conveyed her thoughts. It was almost as if they were saying- “I want to stay with you, but dear ones, even if I am not, I will always remain deep there within you.”
Tears roll by even as I write this little piece of work, as I remember her fondly, as my pillar of strength. And just as her eyes spoke, she is very much still present amongst us.