Understanding and Managing Emotions Using Your Inner Voice

Table of Contents Coffee with Your EmotionsManaging Your Negative EmotionsThe Saviour – Your Inner VoiceThe Naming Of My…
Understanding and managing emotions using inner voice

Certain events can trigger raw emotions within us.  Some of these feelings are so strong that they disable us. This is when we lose our vision or motivation.

Then there are other emotions that have the power to lead us to remarkable heights, removing any obstacle in its path.

How do we maintain a balanced awareness of our emotions? What is the art of managing emotions?

We observe, take note and develop a familiarity with every single emotion that arises.

Whilst remaining focused on our emotions, you will come across feelings that you may not understand.

We have an inner voice that utilises our feelings to pass on messages.  It can be a slow process to recognise and then develop a relationship with this guide.

Over time, we begin to separate our emotions from the ideas and lessons that our voice is attempting to alert us to.

That is why understanding and managing emotions and your inner voice is so important. 

“When our emotional health is in a bad state, so is our level of self-esteem. We have to slow down and deal with what is troubling us, so that we can enjoy the simple joy of being happy and at peace with ourselves.” ~ Jess C. Scott


Coffee with Your Emotions

The boss calls you into his office, with the tone of voice that raises your curiosity.

He tells you a customer has requested you to manage one of their projects.

This opportunity will further improve your career prospects. It would increase your networking circles and put your visibility on the map

You begin to reflect on this unexpected opportunity.  There is pen and paper at your disposal, and you are ready to jot down anything the mind may find relevant.

There is a knock at the BRAIN’S door.  As you unlock the latch and turn the knob, you are looking directly at Doubt.

Smurf in a posture of doubting

You put the kettle on and make coffee.  Doubt dances around your mind, thinking of every scenario that could possibly go wrong.  Starting with all the – What if’s?

  • Of course, this emotion blows everything out of proportion.
  • Doubt can make you feel embarrassed or scared before the event has even occurred.
  • Doubt sits in the middle of your stomach. It makes you feel as if something dreadful is just around the corner.

You appreciate what Doubt has to say.  But you only need to hear it once.

If Doubt attempts to return – stand firm.  Put your hand in the air and say,‘thank you but no thank you’.  There are only so many times you can hear the same old thing.

Then the Day Dreamer comes for a visit.

Smurf in a posture of a daydreamer

Coffee with this part of the imagination is easy.  You get to visualise all the situations where the results are in your favour.

When it comes to this new project, your mind shows you presenting your work like a professional – showing off your skill set, highlighting all your individual qualities.

You visualise coming to the end of your speech, watching everyone absorb your information.  You are the star of the show when the Day Dreamer is in town.


While this is pleasant and comfortable, the coffee is over and Day Dreamer is shown to the door.  There is only so long you can spend with your head in the clouds.

All the positive thoughts are noted.  Now it is time to get back to work.

Before you know it, Nerves taps at the door.

Smurf in a posture of a nerve

Nerves is jumpy, fidgety, and unbalanced.It can make you stutter, shake, talk a little faster, and have spit balls flying from your mouth.

When Nerves has stated its claim, you enthusiastically show it the door.  You can’t wait to be rid of that negativity.  You don’t want to be feeling like this.  Practice makes perfect.

Fear arrives unannounced.

Smurf in a posture of fear

This emotion has the potential to freeze your mind.  How on earth are you going to remember your work, when Fear ambushes you?

  • Fear wants you to remain where you are; it does not like progress. Fear wants you to renege on every opportunity life presents to you.
  • Fear pretends to be your friend and whispers all the excuses as to why it is okay to bail out.
  • Fear can make you restless, lose your appetite, concentration, and sleep.
  • Fear does not just want to stay for coffee, but wants to move in, and can be rather dominating and forceful.

You take note of what Fear has to say.  Then vigorously push it out the door, just as you have done with all the other negative emotions.

With your mind in a swirl, you wonder if you really do have a chance.  And just in the nick of time Determination arrives.

Smurf in a posture of determination

This part of the brain has a reputation for hanging around for days and is more than welcome to do so. A mindset this strong is similar to a superhero wearing a cape.

  • You discuss all your previous visitors with Determination, who dismisses all the other feelings as baloney. It questions why you would even entertain them with coffee.
  • Determination is not easily shaken as preparation leads to positive results.
  • Determination is the no fuss type, it won’t carry on with these the other visitors Doubt, Nerve, or Fear. It refuses friendships or making connections with these insecure characters.
  • Determination presents clear and strict plans, though do-able time-tables.
  • Determination sees the end and manages anything in its path.

Reason knocks at the door and is greeted with open arms.

Smurf in a posture of reasoning

Reason and Determination get busy discussing the possibilities.  Reason works with all the facts regardless of them being positive or negative.

Determination walks solidly towards any challenge. Reason is the caretaker walking side by side, ensuring all the logistics are seen to.

A tap on the minds door and Self-assured has arrived.

Smurf in a posture of being self-assured

Now you feel centred and balanced. This is when you continue with your project, confident of your capabilities.

Not because you are a fake or flimsy.  You have worked really hard to get to where you are.

You feel some major relief now as your dynamite team is together. The odds are in your favour.

You can definitely manage this project. This trio is the disciplined workers. They serve you better.

Smurf in a posture of criticism

Criticism arrives and immediately starts to toss opinions around the room.

The other three raise their heads; they know this personality all too well.  Determination completely ignores Criticism and continues to work.

Reason gives Criticism a small window of opportunity to voice an opinion.  Self-assured looks Criticism up and down and says,“Sorry buster, but you and me-we just don’t gel”!

The three get back to work.  You show Criticism to the door.

RELATED:  Why Criticising Others Is A Lot More Harmful Than You Think.

Smurfs in all forms of emotions

“It is better to experience moment of discomfort in the achievement of your dreams than to be comfortable without accomplishing your dreams.” ~ Lailah Gifty Akita

Managing Your Negative Emotions

Every emotion deserves your attention – if only for a short time.

Negative emotions have a bad reputation.  Common practice is to ignore them completely.  People worry that if they acknowledge these feelings, they will take over.

Any emotion we feel is genuine – deserves exploration.  It’s up to you how much time you want to validate each feeling.

Ignoring our negative emotions is like writing a post with limited knowledge on the subject.  If you don’t research the topic further, you can only work with a small amount of information.

It is far too risky to our reputation and credibility to be working without all the facts.

Listening to these negative emotions gives us insight.  We recognise they are the Drama Queens in our minds.

We empower ourselves when we observe our emotions rather than become hostage to them.

It seems these undesirable feelings present themselves at the most inconvenient of times.

When you feel as if your negatives have started to gain some power, reflect on how many times you have felt this way and overcome these feelings.

There will be periods when we must accept negative emotions, and soldier on whilst feeling uncomfortable.  When we have committed ourselves, continue as planned.

As our confidence builds, we wonder why we entertained these negative thoughts.  They only have the potential to stop our progress if we allow them to.

Think of yourself working in the complaints department at a store.  For every issue that arises, you are the problem solver.  As you begin to see more customers, you start to realise there is a pattern.

Customers continue to bring up the same issues, time and time again.  So you realise that specific area need attention.  After a while, it is nothing more than repetition.

You will discover when you give Nerves, Fear, Doubt and Criticism some consideration; they say the same old thing.

You then begin to give them less thought, and they really do start to lose their power.

A trained and disciplined mind works with the external factors and the internal house-keeping.

Never deny how you feel.  But don’t allow those Drama Queen emotions to linger.

Utilise Determination, Reason and Self-Assured, as they get things done.  With continued use of these super hero’s, you can easily go through your daily routine and managing emotions become an easy task.

DO READ: 4 Personal Qualities That Can Make You Successful

The Saviour – Your Inner Voice

Last but not least, there is one particular tool that I saved for last.  It’s the most important in our kit.

Some refer to this as a spiritual guide or blueprint.  It can be described as our conscious voice, our true spirit, god’s will or angels.  I refer to mine as The Nag.

These steering devices are not for the chosen few.  Everyone has their own internal voice.

It may come in the form of pictures, voices, feelings, dreams, visions, or colours.  You just have to find how yours communicates to you.

We are a slave to our emotions and thoughts

The Naming Of My Inner Voice

Recognising the messages my guide is attempting to convey is at times difficult.  The inner voice can get drowned out by Fear, Doubt, Nerves, or Criticism.

The Nag will become just as repetitive as a negative emotion if I continue to miss messages.  That is how my inner voice got its name.

I lack patience and tolerance when any sort of nagging begins.  I will attempt to escape it at all costs.

The Nag has taken on the one trait that I avoid whenever possible.  That is constant nagging.

I think The Nag is a becoming name of my guide.  As I typed that last sentence, I got a pleasant feeling and a vision of a big smile.  Confirming my conclusion.

Our guides aren’t about to change the way they present their voice or message because of a little doubt.

It is us humans that evolve as the relationship develops with our inner voice.

It may appear as if our guides have gotten louder.  This is not the case.  We have become sensitive to how our guide communicates.

I have a sound relationship with The Nag.  I trust how messages are presented to me.  This is what my nag does for me

  • Advertising campaigns on buildings or buses present me with immediate ideas (most people have this capability). My imagination works over time with pretty colours and pictures.
  • And/or I get a strong feeling that sits in the centre of my stomach.
  • The Nag is so subtle that for years it had gone without any attention. While it is softly spoken, it may as well be yelling at me now, because it always has my full attention.

GOOD READ: How To Boost Self Esteem In 8 Simple Ways

How My Inner Voice Operates

For years, I had wanted to get over my public speaking fears.  I had a few bad experiences.

I was 18 when I had heard about a group of people meeting up to deliver speeches in front of one another.  It was not until I was 28 that I took my first step towards looking into what Toastmasters was about.

Whenever anyone mentioned public speaking, I would become alert and listen carefully.

This would generate a feeling within me.  Sometimes I would get a little disappointed in myself for not having taken action.

Other times I would become impatient or annoyed with myself, thinking I was getting nowhere in this area because I was procrastinating. This was my inner voice alerting to an area where the action was required.

Exercise is a great balancer.  However, I am inconsistent with it.  When I stop exercising, my internal nag will alert me to everything that is fitness related.  I automatically become conscious of:-

  • A back pack with the label ‘Fitness First’ will grab my attention.
  • A gym advertisement will make me think about how slack I have become towards exercise.
  • I am reminded that I am not taking the best care of myself when I see someone wearing an exercise outfit.

It is never long before exercise comes back into my life.  When I begin again, all these subtle signs no longer stand out.

MUST READ: 5 Daily Positive Affirmations For Happiness In Life

Emotions and feels need to be managed

How to Recognise Your Inner Voice

  • What continues to repeat itself in your mind? What nags at you?
  • What are you constantly reminded of? What do you long to do but give yourself a thousand excuses why you can’t?
  • The uncomfortable feeling that disappears without a trace as soon as you begin doing what you have always wanted to.

Unfortunately, people do become numb or deaf to their voice.  Others drown it with alcohol, drugs, overeating, or gambling.

When I am heading in the wrong direction, my imagination will start showing me pictures of alarms bells or sirens.

It’s similar to that of an ambulance or a police car running around in my mind, lighting up, and spinning around in red and blue colours.

Another way I receive messages is through music.  A song might play in my mind but the words are different to the original lyrics.  This is whenThe Nag is trying to tell me something.

Before, I was a little confused as to what it was, sometimes even a little frightened.  But it is what I have been blessed with.  The Nag only has my best interests at heart.

Our emotions come in handy.  They are attached to the strengths and limitations of who we are.  I embrace them all but manage them differently.

The Nag is like the night watchman of the mind, guarding me against myself and some of the decisions I make.

HELPFUL READ: How to Hear Your Inner Voice

Emotions can get in the way of get you on the way

Wrapping Up

A full examination of all our emotions is necessary.  This ensures we are working with all the facts.

We feel super charged when our positive emotions dominate.  Our inner voice is easier to recognise with these feelings.  When combined, the two are a powerful force.

Fear, Doubt, Nerves, Criticism, and the Day Dreamer all visit to share their views.  Feel and observe all of them.

This will alert you to the repetitive nature of these emotions.  It becomes obvious they are the time wasters of the mind.

Discipline is required when our negative moods present themselves.

Our inner voice presents in the same manner regardless of what emotion is prominent. Managing emotions using inner voice is an effective solution

With a positive state of mind, you are better able to comprehend your guide’s messages.  

“Just like it is so important to understand the difference in thinking and feeling to increase our Emotional Intelligence, it is important to take the time to understand the difference in emotional feelings and gut feelings to further increase our intelligence and facility of intuition that we call Intuitional Intelligence.” ~ Martha Char Love

Over to You –

What emotions do you allow to stir your mind? How do you deal with your emotions?

Photo credit: Sony Pictures Animation. SMURF, and all Smurfs characters ©Peyo


Disclaimer: Though the views expressed are of the author’s own, this article has been checked for its authenticity of information and resource links provided for a better and deeper understanding of the subject matter. However, you're suggested to make your diligent research and consult subject experts to decide what is best for you. If you spot any factual errors, spelling, or grammatical mistakes in the article, please report at [email protected]. Thanks.

  1. Hello Rachel and welcome to Harleena’s blog…

    This is an interesting topic and a wonderful writing skill. The read was an interesting one and i must say, i am glad i read a post like this at this time of the year 🙂

    This is how i deal with my emotions – sit back, play Sam Cook records and relax 😉 . I don’t let my emotion get the best of me, whether the happy or the sad one.

    Thanks for dropping such a wonderful post, i appreciate.
    Have a lovely week both of you.

    1. Hey Babanature,

      I like how you deal with your emotions. Music is certainly a wonderful way to unwind, relax and take the tension away.

      What I really got from your response is, you recognise that you have both happy and sad emotions but regardless of how you feel you remain neutral (don’t let my emotions get the best of me). Very impressive Babanature.

      Thanks for you comments, it was great to meet you.


  2. Hey Irina,

    Nice to meet you.

    It is great to hear that you have the tools and resources to keep your overwhelming emotions under control. This automatically tells me you have been working on yourself. It is only when we are conscious of emotions that we are able to work, manage or deal with them.

    I am glad you can relate to The Nag – the steering device that is the guiding light. I am highly amused when you say that your inner voice has kept you out of trouble and on the right track countless times. That I relate to instantly. That is why my relationship with my guide is so trusted.

    Thanks for your comments.


  3. I am an anxious person by nature, so I have to find ways to quiet the emotions like fear. I do acknowledge them , but need to find ways, like exercise and breathing techniques, so that I can hear my inner voice. This post was really helpful in seeing how it all comes together. Plus, I love the Smurf graphics 🙂

    1. Hey Shann,

      I know those anxious nerves myself. They have the capacity to really knock us around. I used to get the equivalent of heart beat sounds in my ears and begin to shallow breath.

      Shann it looks as though you have thought about this a lot. Being self aware and having tools means you are equipped to dealing with anxious when you start to feel it coming on. Are you aware of any repeated triggers that occur as you start to feel anxious? For example, nerves for me, is a real issue when I care about an outcome. I give it too much value and then I unbalanced myself. That is what nerves is too me.

      Thank you for sharing. It is great to know you have techniques that work for you.


    2. Welcome to the blog Shann 🙂

      Some of us are anxious and tend to get nervous very often. I can relate to the ‘butterfly feeling’ in the stomach too! However, over time, as one matures with age, one learns to calm down and take it easy. Yes, deep breaking and exercises help, and so does yoga and meditation, if you’ve tried them. They help you connect with your inner-self, your inner voice for sure. Smurf – they are everyone’s favorite in this post!

      Thanks for stopping by and sharing your views, we do appreciate it 🙂

  4. Hi Rachel, wonderful post you have shared about human emotions. I was very emotional during my college days. And in my first job, I was an emotional fool, doing all the donkey work assigned by my boss which was actually his work and one day, I realized through my inner voice, that its enough, now have to be strong and give back to people who tries to make me fool and want to take benefits from me. Thanks for sharing this inspiring post!

    1. Hey Ana,

      I think we are all emotional through our teenage and college years. Taking control of our emotions comes with practice.

      Sounds like your boss actually lost a great worker by exploiting you. Glad you inner voice stepped in. Bringing something to an end (like a job or a relationship) can feel scary initially but after a while when we trust our inner voice we know it is the right thing.

      There will always be some people where we have to be tougher than we want to be because they don’t understand it any other way. Thanks for sharing some of your tough times with us Ana.


    2. Welcome to the blog Ana 🙂

      So glad you could relate to the post. Yes, some of us are more emotional and sensitive than others, but that’s good in a way I feel as we are able to express ourselves better. But yes, as you mentioned, we cannot let people take advantage of us in such a situation, and I am glad you listened to your inner voice and changed yourself for the better.

      Thanks for stopping by and sharing your views, we appreciate it 🙂

  5. Hi Rachel,

    What a great analysis, I can see that you put a lot of thought and heart into this post. It’s a great reminder that in most cases negative emotions can take over only if we allow them. Sometimes fear and nerves feel overwhelming, but I know that I have the tools and resources to keep them under control, I just need to be aware of them.

    I love how you call your inner voice “The Nag”. Sounds extremely appropriate, my inner voice feels very similar to yours and has kept me out of trouble and on the right track countless times.

    Thank you for sharing your insight!

    1. Welcome to the blog Irina 🙂

      You’re absolutely right about that, as Rachel’s done wonders with this post and I am so glad it’s been picked up so well. Yes indeed, if we think negative, we invite those negative thoughts and emotions, while if we think positive, we are surrounded with positivism. I guess the LOA plays a major role here, isn’t it?

      Good to know you have things all under control, and yes – The Nag – seems to be liked by all. Thanks for stopping by, we appreciate it. 🙂

  6. Great work, Rachel!

    Since everything you wrote about the emotions happens so quickly, we usually don’t notice what exactly is going on in our mind. That fast automatic response to toxic emotions makes us hard to stay centered. Reading your post allowed me to feel like I was sitting in a very quiet place grounded and watching all those emotions and thoughts running around me till they are gone.

    Thank you for sharing your great analysis!

    In love & gratitude,

    1. Hey Keiko,

      Great to meet you. I could not agree with you more. Our emotions change within a moments notice. That is why I am a firm believer in reflection. Our rawest of emotions are not forgotten.

      After we have reacted to an emotion we can take some time out to question what created such a strong feeling within us. Then ask yourself if the situation was to happen again what would you do differently.

      I am so pleased that you enjoyed the post. Thank you for your feedback.


  7. Hey Rachel,

    Great to see you here at Aha Now and what a wonderful topic. Sorry I’m so late in getting back by here to share my own thoughts.

    How do I handle my emotions? I get up every single morning and thank the Lord for everything that I have, am and the people in my life. How can you not have a good attitude after you think about that!

    I just learned a long time ago that whenever I’m upset or mad that I continue to feel bad. That we can’t control a lot of things but we definitely can control how we think and that leads to how we feel. Does that mean we’re great at everything all the time? No, we’re only human but the more you’re aware the better you are at handling things.

    What a wonderful topic and I’ve already shared it of course. Thanks so much for sharing this with us here and I hope both you ladies have a wonderful week.


    1. Hey Adrian,

      Being grateful and full of gratitude is a wonderful way to start your day Adrian. I roll out of bed and onto my meditation mat.

      When our emotions are rather strong we get a choice of reacting or responding to them. Controlling our minds rather than allowing our emotions to take over takes practice.

      When we are upset or mad we certainly do feel bad. We have to pass through this period even though it causes us to be uncomfortable. It is what we do with our actions in this time frame that can be our teacher.

      Either highlighting we are on the right track because we managed to get through this phase as we would any other emotion. Or it shows us which emotion we need to be more aware of as it has the potential to make us act in ways we may regret later.

      Big smile, yes we are nothing more than human. That gives us the right to make mistakes and try again until we are satisfied with the outcome.

      Always enjoy your comments Adrian, thank you.


  8. Rachel,
    A question for you:
    Is the inner voice just another emotion? Your post made it look like your inner voice is just another emotion that ‘Nags’ you.


    1. Hey Ankush,

      Big smile – I knew you would come up with something great to think about.

      Our emotions are strong and how we manage them are indicators of where we are at mentally. Negative emotions have the power to give us good or bad days. All dependent on how we control our minds.

      The Nag is very balanced – and is watching out for me. I could have called my inner voice Jeff or Carol. The Nag is powerfully subtle, nothing like my emotions.

      Thanks for the visit Ankush.


      1. I’m still confused. There are subtle emotions as well. And those are equally powerful. Those may also steer you in some particular direction or compel you to make a choice.

        The inner voice does ask you to make a decision, isn’t it?

        Since i am always looking at things from a spiritual and awakened perspective, i know i don’t have an inner ‘voice’.

        If i speak about myself, what i have is inner balance and that is where i stand and see my emotions.

        It is like sitting in a park watching traffic from left and right, yet enjoying the flower i hold in my hand. 🙂


        1. Hey Ankush,

          Our inner voice just guides us. It is not like it speaks in the sense of conversation. Think about when you want to do something but have been putting it off. You continue to leave it on hold because you have other priorities. However every now and again you get a feeling that you really want to do this thing, maybe a longing. You will be reminded of it every so often. Sometimes you may annoyed with yourself, other times you may think – right I am going to take action.

          An example. I was India years ago. I had just finished dinner and was walking back to my room and I was going to take a short cut down a dark lane way because I was lazy and tired.

          Upon the initial thought I got a feeling not to go down that way. But I wanted to take a short cut. As I got closer the feeling got stronger to take the long way. I ignored it once again and continued and just before I was about to walk down the lane – I lost a tone of energy. The last feeling was so strong I was physically weak.

          I decided to take the long way and felt immediately normal again. I was no more than 20 metres past the lane when 5 drunk rowdy guys came out of the lane.

          I will think about it some more tonight and get back to you with more examples. Thanks for the questions – I like your train of thought.


  9. Hey Donna,

    I love the way you put it – “Lest we become their slaves”. I have had many years of being captive to the negatives. This served nobody least of all myself. It was not practical nor logical to continue along this path.

    The thought of being over ruled by my emotions was a startling realisation and it snapped me into action. I was going to become so familiar with what was going on. I was going to rid these negative emotions, never to feel them again.

    However on the road to learning about these emotions I came know that every feeling served a purpose. I had to decide which ones remained in power. And it is exactly like you said ‘it is not a matter of conquering our emotions’ it is becoming familiar with each and every one of them. Then applying different strategies to manage these emotions.

    The best one I know is to plan and set a date for action. I know a couple of days leading up to the actionable day – it will be very busy in my mind with every negative coming to visit. I accept that. Do your best negatives! But once that day arrives I soldier march with determination. I refuse to be incapacitated by my emotions. What I have found after a while the negatives are drowned out.

    Always good reading your comments Donna.


  10. Hi Rachel,

    This is a delightful way to describe the struggles we all have with our emotions and nagging self talk.

    You’ve highlighted all the key emotions we need to master, lest we become their slaves. Things like doubt and fear are always present, but we can give them a minor role within our Self, or we can let them rise to prominence. As masters, it’s really up to us. As slaves, we are overwhelmed and victimized by them.

    I especially like how you keep these little “drama queens” in their place, by wisely developing a winning self talk… our savior.

    As you point out, it’s not a matter of conquering our emotions, as they do play an important role in keeping us aware of ourselves, our weaknesses and our pitfalls. But we must manage them, lest they take over and run the show. Our little “nag” keeps us always sharp and on target.


  11. I have to get better at managing my negative emotions. I have 2 children, 6 months and 3 years old, and they each test my emotions multiple times a day. I notice my emotions rub off on my 3 year old easily so I really need to keep them in check.

    1. Hey Christine

      Thank you for sharing. I could imagine your emotions being all over the place with two children under 5. An emotionally tough job with wonderful rewards. Trying different tools to balance your emotions when things are getting a little hectic will assist when the negatives are foremost in our minds.

      I was never good at that counting to 10, I got there too fast. But maybe breathing and a few affirmations confirming you are in control of your emotions. Let me know if you want an in depth description of some tools that might be of help.

      Your three year old has you as one of the finest teachers around – of course some of those emotions that make us impatient, sad or mad will rub off just like the generous and kind ones. But the negatives stand out more.

      Thanks for your comments.


    2. Welcome to the blog Christine 🙂

      You’re not the only one to go through such a trying phase! And with two young ones, it gets all the more tougher. But let me tell you, it’s a passing phase, as I’ve gone through it, and other moms too – so just hold on and keep the faith. Yes, you need to keep your calm and remain patience, especially with your 3 year old – besides giving him/her more attention.

      Thanks for stopping by, we do appreciate it 🙂

      BTW – Do add your Gravatar or profile picture, so we know who we are talking to. Just a friendly suggestion. 🙂

  12. Hey Carolyn,

    Nice to meet you. Thanks for your valuable feedback.

    What your friend said about your instinct (especially in the romance department) is what we all need to hear more often. I have had gut instincts for so long I can’t recollect when I began to notice them. They do want to be heard don’t they?

    I was really good at ignoring the ones that did not suit me. I have been crushed and hurt when I have not followed these instincts. However the lessons I gained from not listening to my guide transformed into valuable lessons. And to some degree they were like the “I told you so” that we all dread hearing.

    It is great to hear you have developed a wonderful relationship to your inner voice. Carolyn it is all for you. Our guides will never steer us wrong. When us humans ignore our inner voice – well that is what creates the chaos.

    Wasn’t the smurf idea great. That we can thank Harleena for. I thought it was a marvelous idea.


  13. Our emotional states are our most powerful and only truly residual resources. Yet, as you so succinctly pointed out, so many of us are slaves to emotional reactions versus the master of the state. I love not only the caricatures but also the powerful tips you gave to becoming more aware of our triggers and reactions, then more in control of what they are. Great article!!

    1. Welcome to the blog Robert 🙂

      You are right about our emotional states being the most powerful one – and we all do become slaves to our emotions sometime or the other, isn’t it? So glad you liked the caricatures and tips mentioned in the post.

      Thanks for stopping by, we do appreciate it 🙂

      BTW – Do add a Gravatar or profile picture, so we know who we are talking to, as I see you have a lovely picture at your blog. Just a friendly suggestion. 🙂

    2. Hey Robert,

      Wonderful to meet you. If we took away our powerful emotions we would be operating on numb. Our emotional states are very powerful. I used to think feelings were nothing but a burden and required conquering. How would we appreciate happy if we did not know sad? How would we learn discipline and control over the mind?

      None of us a free of emotional tough days. It’s how we manage and represent ourselves on these days that highlights strength or where work is required.

      Thanks for your comments Robert.


  14. Hi Rachel, Wow, what a wonderful guest post here at Harleena’s blog! You told a story and took us on a journey of understanding how to listen to our inner voices.

    So often we want to push away our inner voices, whether for the good or the bad. But if we listen to our voice, we will gain wisdom and insight.

    When I was young and single, I had a friend who told me I should “listen to my gut” about the guys I dated. She said if my gut was telling me that the guy wasn’t right for me then I should move on.

    She was right about romance, but that voice also knows best about other parts of your life, like your job, friends, behaviours, etc.

    I have paid attention to my inner voice since then, but never thought of my voice as being multiple voices, nor looking like Smurfs. How fun!

  15. Hey Rachel, Hi Harleena,

    Rachel, it’s so cool seeing you here on Harleena’s blog.
    I’m excited to see this collaboration take place.

    This is such a wonderful message, and I think it’s a great thing that more of us are realizing the importance of observing our own emotions and thoughts and questioning them.

    Over the last few years, I have learned just how important it is to invite my own emotions to speak freely to me so I can understand what they have to tell me. I have found that while this can be a scary thing to do, it’s even more frightening to run away from them because they always catch up to us – and with additional force.

    It’s like this…
    When God wants you to know something, it’ll show up first as a whisper. The volume increases as long as we don’t listen and before we know it, it becomes this highly dramatic experience because we didn’t take the time to acknowledge what our intuition was trying to communicate.

    When we pay attention through observing our internal environment as well as the external one, we get to understand what we’ve been carrying around within us and how it affects our lives in every way possible. We can then see if these messages are even valid by questioning them – as it’s possible that they may simply be lingering effects of an event from a long time ago that we haven’t healed.

    Before this turns into a book, I’ll just say that I think you’re a great writer and I love what you have to express. I think that while the noise of the world has certainly gotten louder, us humans want to gain a sense of peace and balance…and it’s looking within as well as without that will help us to expand and grow properly.

    Thanks for writing this Rachel…and thank-you Harleena for supplying the rest of us with a blog that covers such helpful and important topics.
    Have a wonderful week Ladies 🙂

    1. Hey Dana,

      What a wonderful comment. The collaboration with Harleena has been an amazing learning curb. I really advise everyone to have an experience like this to grow as a developing blogger.

      Dana again we are on the same page – when we ignore or are deaf to the whispers, those amazing messages we receive, things start to happen. Before we know it chaos has reined and we wonder where it came from.

      For years I looked externally for the answers. I am telling you I looked hard. So blind was I that I had an internal belief system that held all the answers, truths that I required. I don’t dwell on the fact that some lessons take me a while and this one certainly did. I am where I am now with an unshakable strength in myself and the messages I receive.

      You are so right some of those emotions are terribly scary and often very uncomfortable. But if we ignore them the feelings are worse. I have learnt to become comfortable with uncomfortable. If I have a plan and have set a date to do something, no emotion will get in the way. I like how you put it – I invite my emotions to speak freely.

      As I have gotten older – it have become more evident that I am far more effective with balance. Not too high (which really was a problem for me) and not too low – which could be very down.

      I appreciate your feedback and the energy that comes with it.


    2. Hi Dana,

      Exciting to see Rachel here, isn’t it? And yes, it’s been a wonderful collaboration, especially as its her first guest post. I’m so glad she chose Aha!NOW to start off her guest posting journey.

      So glad you liked her post and could relate so well to it. Thanks for your wonderful comment and share all over, we so appreciate it. 🙂

  16. Great article and an interesting take on what we as hypnotherapists like to call the subconscious mind or sometimes the inner child. In many cases our emotional reaction to certain situations is created when we are young children. At the time the reaction may have been appropriate but over time the subconscious repeats the behaviour again and again at times when it is no longer suitable. As therapists will help our clients gain awareness of why their inner voice is reacting negatively so that positive change can be created.

    1. Hey Martina,

      Nice to meet you. I agree that we can react to certain situations due to a childhood events.

      I believe it is up to an individual, if they want to go back and pin point where the reaction started.

      Changing our behaviour is a slow process. Breaking habits and finding new ways of doing things can be a one step forward to two step backward process.

      Thanks for sharing your point of view.


    2. Welcome to the blog Martina 🙂

      Glad you liked Rachel’s post and could relate to it. You are right about certain life situations created in our mindset when we are young, though not always. But those that do, have a deep impact and show up in various ways once we grow up I think. As Rachel mentioned, we can all change if we wish to, we just need to be willing to take that step, isn’t it?

      Thanks for stopping by and sharing your views with us, we do appreciate it 🙂

      BTW – Do add your Gravatar or profile picture, so we know who we are talking to. Just a friendly suggestion. 🙂

  17. Hi Rachel,

    It’s great to see you here at Harleena’s place.

    Wow, this is an amazing post. I used to let my emotions run away. If I was upset, I did nothing to reel it in and change my emotions and mood.

    Fear and worry used to get the best of me but it wasn’t until I became close with God that I realized I have the power to control my emotions. Like Jason, I stop and pray and take a moment to regroup and gather my thoughts. When I keep my focus on God, it’s only happy, positive emotions I’m feeling.

    It’s not to say that I don’t show negative emotions or release a good cry when I need to. I validate my emotions, deal with them in a positive way and not take it out on anyone, and move on.

    This was such a great post Rachel. I enjoyed reading it from beginning to end.

    Hello Harleena.

    Thank you for inviting Rachel to share her voice and wonderful writing with us.

    Have a great day ladies.


    1. Hey Cori,

      I know exactly what you mean when you say you let your emotions run away. Oh I was one to allow all those negative emotions to rule me for years. It was only when I started to meditate that I realised I was far more balanced. Then I started looking at emotions.

      I really had to get a hold of them. Some of those negative emotions can really take hold and turn a gentle soul into a living nightmare to herself and those around her.

      It was time to really inspect what could be worked with. I had achieved many milestones in my life so I knew there was strength there – but I had ruined enough relationships to know I was not striking a balance. An investigation began. Books, writing – and a path to self development has been a twenty year trip with my meditation on and off.

      You turn to god, like I sit and breath. I love how we know there is something way bigger than ourselves – so we can really harness a strength that is such a positive force.

      Thanks for your wonderful comments. You always seem to get me typing madly across the keyboard.


    2. Hi Cori,

      So glad you liked Rachel’s post – her very first one in the blogosphere, which makes it all the more special to her and to us 🙂

      Thanks so much for stopping by, we do appreciate it 🙂

  18. Hi Rachel

    An Amazing post!

    To manage our emotions and the inner voice is one of the most important factors in our life. We should always listen to our inner voice and never let negative emotions harm us.

    Its great to know that you found the way to deal with them.

    Thanks for sharing!

    1. Hey Sonal,

      I could not agree with you more. Managing our emotions is essential so that we have a better chance of hearing our inner voice. But it is an ongoing process not something we arrive at. It requires persistent work.

      I certainly takes determination, reason and self assurance to drown out those negative emotions. Thanks for your kind words. Much appreciated.

      Talk soon.


  19. Hi Rachel,

    I am glad to meet you here with a wonderful post on managing emotions. The innovative style of meeting all those little monsters and then handling them in a positive manner is very interesting.

    There is a strong connection between emotions and intuition, both challenge each other and at the same time cement each other. Fear is always guided by intuition and the latter kicks the former out slowly. In fact all negative emotions, which are apparently powerful have to bow before reason and determination. I agree with your observations that inner voice plays a significant role in helping us manage our emotions.

    However inner voice is not always heard, often it is snubbed and therefore one has to make a conscious effort to let this voice develop, get stronger and refuse those put downs by negativity, the rival force, which is always creeping up slowly. This post can surely inspire all those who don’t pay much heed to their inner voice. I believe we can deal with all kind of emotions by listening to them, letting them seep within and then manage them with self-compassion.

    Thanks for sharing a valuable post with the members of Aha-now.

    1. Hey Balroop,

      Wonderful to meet you.

      We are stuck in our own mind for the rest of our life. So we might as well investigate it and find tools around what is unpleasant for us.

      You have just mentioned the secret formula. Fear and doubt, do have to bow down to determination and reason. The latter are far more powerful. That is why we must accept being uncomfortable for certain periods of time. When we embrace this we step outside of the negative and into the positive.

      Our inner voice is all knowing and love. However it will only ever guide in its own way. It does not compete and remains the same (a very balanced force). It is us humans that become more in tune when we start to develop a relationship and trust what we feel, see or hear.

      Developing a sound relationship with ourselves to nurture our intuition takes time but is worthy of all the effort. Thanks so much for your impressive comments. I look forward to visiting your blog.


  20. Hey Rachel,

    Good job on your guest post.

    Emotions are fun, hey? I’m glad you’ve found a way that works for you in dealing with them and getting through the doubt and the fear.

    You must have a sense of humour to call your inner voice The Nag. Har har! I’ve never thought of my own inner voice in this way. That’s the beauty of humans – our differences make us who we are as much as our similarities do.

    I absolutely love the main photo/graphic that you created for this piece. It’s lovely.

    Take good care,


    1. Hey Jenn,

      Those dam emotions. One could wonder where we would be without them. We are packed full of emotions so I don’t even spend time on those thoughts.

      I have never been one to shrink away from working on the tough stuff, however in saying that I need a little planning and thinking time. Once we master our emotions – half the battle is won. So investigating the ones that push us ahead as opposed to the ones that would have me sitting on the couch all day, eating chocolate was worth the effort.

      The Nag where would I be without my guide. The one who has my back and watches out for a person who can be so easily distracted. I tell you my inner voice was not handed a job to work with someone easy. But The Nag certainly has my attention so one would say I am well trained.

      I agree we need the differences to be curious about one another and similarities in order to get along. Thanks for the comments.


  21. Hi Rachel,

    Great post! Well thought out too – especially the emotions that one travels through when taking on a big challenge.

    I’ve found that when my emotions get in the way it’s usually because they have something to communicate to me that I need to look at.

    I’ve found EFT, Emotional Freedom Technique, aka Tapping to be an excellent way to get to the bottom of what’s really going on, when you can’t find a rational explanation for why you’re feeling the way you are.

    Good use of the SMURFS too! How you used them tied the post together very nicely!



    1. Hey Quinn,

      Aren’t the Smurfs just a wonderful touch to the post? You can thank Harleena for the pictures.

      Oh don’t we go through some grief before we start a project. We can near come to a halt before we have even begun, with the issues our mind puts us through. I am okay with the chatter that goes on. But when the big day comes to start a project, it is time to soldier march towards breaking down those barriers.

      It is only when we are on our way that we get to apply our skill set and gained knowledge. As we strive forward we wonder what the point was with all the fear and doubt.

      I am not sure about your techniques, I will certainly research them over the next couple of days. But Quinn if you have tools to overcome the negative emotions stick with them. Whatever works. My motivation for checking out your tools, is the more I have in my tool kit, the more I get to test run and share with others.

      Thanks for your comments.


  22. Hi Rachel

    Congratulations and good to see you at Harleena’s blog as a guest contributor. Well written post on managing your emotions and your inner voice. Very helpful links – will take some time to go through all of them 🙂

    In answer to your question, what I do to manage my emotions is through the use of prayer and reading God’s word. It is there I find answers on how to deal with emotions such as fear, doubt, anger, criticism and so on. The way that I handle the negative emotions is through the use of positive affirmations, mantras and what the Lord says – for example fear is not from him and what cancels the fear factor for me is the word that says God did not give us a spirit of fear but one of power, love and a sound and confident mind.

    Great job. Thanks for sharing.

    1. Hey Yvonne,

      Yes I wipe the sweat from my brow and say phew – I finally faced the fear of guest posting. So thanks for your comment.

      Yvonne I have always admired your strength in character and faith. It is what draws me to you. I myself have not used mantra’s or affirmation when fear is around, but what mighty tools. I have practiced both in the past. I certainly understand why you would use them. Incredibly powerful, where fear and doubt have no chance of remaining.

      You have definitely planted another seed for me to try when my negative emotions are starting to misbehave. I may offer this advice to others when I share information. So thank you.


  23. Hey Rachel,

    This sounds like all the emotions I go through whenever I want to try something new. I go back and forth whether to go for it or not.

    But yes I ‘the nag’ when I procrastinate or when I’m convincing myself not to do it. Like you I get those indirect reminders of just taking the bull by the horn a d run with it lol… I was like this with teaching, learning to play an instrument and permforming, and many other hobbies I wanted to do.

    But I tell you this. I’m glad that I listened to my own Nag because now I don’t regret not going for those goals. Now I have some more to add to my life’s resume!

    Thanks for sharing Rachel! Have a great week!

    1. Hey Sherman

      I am like you every time I start something new – oh my emotions will try every dam thing to stop me. Yet my nag is watching and guiding. It sometimes feel like if I don’t do it The Nag will never stop nagging and my negative emotions are on the other side saying, ‘don’t do it’. It right at that moment where all you can do is take the bull by the horn. And in between these two very strong forces is me the human, the most tangible of this triangle who is the most vulnerable.

      For this very reason we learn to get on with it. Because The Nag will not stop where the negative emotions are squashed with confidence, determination and a massive thrill.

      I am hearing what you are saying about those indirect reminders. They are so soft and gentle but they may as well be an explosion because they always have my attention. How exciting Sherman that you nailed some of your goals. Great work, that always brings a smile to my face. Thanks for you comments I got a chuckle out of the similarities in our views.


  24. Hi, Rachel

    Wonderful post in self management of emotion.

    The effect of negative emotion is so huge that it prevents people to reach his or her destination. They include doubt, fear, procrastination, etc.

    We can manage using our positive internal voice. That powerful internal voice can be obtained only when we know our own identities – who we are on the earth. Then we will not be easily moved by people criticism, our own doubt and fear.

    Awesome, will share

    -Stella Chiu

    1. Hey Stella,

      Our negative emotions are the cripplers. They can really do so much harm. However there seems to be more and more information being shared on this subject. There are so many ways to tackling our emotions. We have just got to find what works for ourselves.

      I have accepted there will be times when my negative emotions will want to rule even when I am attempting to rule them out. A real fight goes on mentally. We have all felt that. Especially when we start to dismiss the negatives. That is when I have be stronger than usual.

      What a delight our internal voice is. So balanced, so strong – one can feel blessed that they are on our side. It took a while to get there but its a wonderful place to be. My days of letting others impact for too long are over. It is far more important how I look upon myself that counts. Thanks for your wonderful comments.


  25. Hey Rachel

    I have one word for your efforts: Awesome

    It is really important to manage emotions and your inner voice in our life. People talk about handling the physical health. No one puts so much focus on the mental health. It is really important to keep a check on our emotions. Otherwise, it becomes difficult to catch hold of all the changes.

    It is always better to realize the changes in the beginning. I also believe we must give attention to our negative thoughts. By suppressing them, we create more urge to think about them. The more we suppress it, more it comes out strongly.

    I love the way you have chosen SMURF. With them, you have taken the post to a different level. Thanks Harleena Mam for allowing Rachel to spread her emotions with all of us.

    1. Hey Yatin,

      Thanks for your wonderful comments. We should never be scared or worried about any emotions. When we manage our feelings we are taking control of our mind. This is a very important skill.

      As I was writing this post there were moments of doubt and feeling uncomfortable. I was stepping outside of my comfort zone, however I had made a commitment to myself so I continued and stood firm. I actually used those emotions to write some of the post.

      Suppressing our emotions – what an unpleasant way of dismissing what is rising within us. When we do this, like you said they get stronger, but we also keep them hanging around a lot longer by doing so. Being aware and acknowledging these feelings allows the negative emotions to surface. We get to look at them, take what we need and move them along. And that my friend is controlling our mind and our emotions.

      I agree with you Yatin, there is a lot more focus on physical health. However mental health is just as important and looking after both means we are on the right track.

      Great catching up.


  26. I have found when dealing with the emotional roller-coaster of the emotions, it is best if I stop and take a moment to pray. Fear is not of the Lord, neither is doubt or any negative emotion. The Lord is always Faithful to show me the path to choose, and gives me the wisdom and ability to accomplish the tasks at hand.

    Loved the post, and the links provided. The visualizations of the Smurfs took me down a nice trip of Memory Lane.

    I would love for you to check out my site, Walking In My Destiny. It would be an honor for an experienced Blogger to give me some insight.

    God Bless!

    1. Hey Jason,

      I agree we are on a roller coaster ride with our emotions. I certainly appreciate where you get your strength. I always think the Lord has a sense of humor. He leads or guides us to where he wants us – but he prepares us along the way.

      Once we trust our faith we do come to a realisation that the only thing is holding us back is ourselves. My relationship with the Lord has developed over time. I know we should believe with our everything, but I do think it is has been a process. When I put total faith into the Heavens above I realise I should have done it sooner, however that comes with knowledge, trust and love. That has been my experience.

      Aren’t the Smurf’s wonderful – I too went for a walk down memory lane. Of course Jason I will check out your blog and look forward to it. Give me a couple of days. Thanks for your wonderful comments.


      1. My prayers are with you, my friend. If you have a specific need, feel free to email me from my site, and I will pray the moment I get it.

        God Bless!

        1. Thanks Jason,

          I always enjoy the idea of being in other people’s prayers. Thank you.

          I need for nothing, just plodding a long. Oh more time please. Maybe an eight day week and more hours in a day. I even love Mondays now I blog.

          Talk soon Jason.


    2. Welcome to the blog Jason 🙂

      So glad you liked Rachel’s post and could relate so well to it. Without prayers, nothing really works. He is always there to guide us and clear the clouds of fear and doubt, and that’s one reason most people turn to Him, isn’t it?

      Smurfs have struck a chord with most readers of this post, and yes, it does take us down memory lane. You have a wonderful site, as I just visited and left you a comment as well. Let us know if we can help you with anything, anytime.

      Thanks for stopping by, we appreciate it 🙂

  27. Hi Rachael,
    So nice seeing you here. We have been friends on Facebook and i knew you write posts on self-help, but this one is completely fabulous. A very well written in-depth guide.

    I like your approach towards managing your Nag. Hearing your inner voice and then working towards it is always very important.
    You get ideas through pretty colors! That’s a good thing. Finding an inspiration from things around us. 🙂

    I like when you say to closely observe fear, day dreams and emotions of those sort. Its through observations that we can act upon them and wade them away 🙂

    have a great week Rachel.

    1. Hey Swadhin,

      We are friends on facebook – I have been thoroughly amused with some of your posts.

      I am in such a good place with my inner voice. It was only last night I got the colours of a banner I have been thinking about. Can I tell you Swadhin, when things first starting developing with my inner voice – I began to think I had a mental illness. There was a period of time where I was not sure what was going on. That was many years ago. They were very uncertain times.

      However now I embrace all the messages, pictures, feelings. A guide that shows me which way to go. Leads me. When I take the intended path I have enjoyed, learnt or engaged with people that have reaffirmed that I was meant to be where I was.

      Its important to feel and comprehend each emotion. We will never be rid of these feelings – although we do get to manage them. And that is all we can ask of ourselves – not to be kept hostage by the ones that feel rotten but don’t serve us. Thanks for your comments.


  28. Hi Rachel,

    Good to see you here with your wonderful guest post. 🙂

    A well knitted comprehensive study indeed!!
    Oh my.. the well connected links are really worth going through,
    In fact this is a vast subject to study and deal it with carefully.

    Emotions can play a vital role in the movement of our everyday life.

    You brought out lot of informative tips to face it or tackle it wisely.

    Thanks Harleena for sharing Rachel’s wonderful and educational piece to your Ahaians 🙂

    Keep sharing

    May you both have a great and profitable and blessed day.



    1. Hey Philip,

      Thanks for your kind words. Our emotions have the potential to get in the way of actions. They really do have the power to stop us from pursuing our dreams. Once we realise which one serve us better we really do have a chance of breaking through our own barriers.

      I have been one to be done in by fear, doubt, criticism and nerves. These emotions have had me day dreaming but going nowhere. It was after long periods of no action that I started to get annoyed with myself.

      I watched my emotions and listened closely. I did get some great ideas from my negative emotions – they seem to prepare us, but we certainly don’t want them hanging around.

      The big wake up for me was being uncomfortable was only temporary, it never lasted but always seemed to be with me when I am starting something new or care about something. So now I say – come on uncomfortable lets begin because there is no way I am going to be stopped by that critter. Thanks for your comments.


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